What's worse than dropping a dollar down the drain? Getting your nipple ripped off by a pair of pliers

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Why did the two men kiss? Because they were both homosexual and attracted to members of the same sex.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a fish.

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Your mom is so fat, that it causes great concern for her family.

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Why don't they sell aspirin in the jungle? Because it is not financially viable to sell pharmaceuticals in a largely unpopulated area.

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Roses are red violets are blue sugar is sweet and so are you, but the rose are wilted the violets are dead the sugar is lumpy and so is your head.

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Two men walk into a bar, the third one ducks.

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When life gives you lemons...you probably just found lemons.

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Why did Simon drown? Simon couldn't swim.

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What do you call a black person with a million dollars? A millionaire.

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What did the orphan boy get for his birthday? The extermination of his race.

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A black man didn't walk into a bar

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How many mice does it take to screw in a light bulb? None. Mice don't have the strength required to do that.

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Why God isn't a woman? Because Moses wouldn't last it 40 days on the mountain if that was true. And he also wouldn't come back with only 10 rules.

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A girl asked a guy if he thought she was pretty, He said 'No'. She asked him if he would want to be with her forever. He said 'no'. She then asked him if she were to leave would he cry, Once again, he replied 'no'. She had heard enough. As she walked away, tears streaming down her face the boy grabbed her arm and said.. 'Asking emotionally charged hypothetical questions that are completely irrelevant to the prior conversation is known as fishing for compliments. Except, your tears seem to reflect a more serious inner emotional neediness. I suggest you seek a psychologist.'

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I raped someone in my basement... ...Just Kidding!... ...I dont have a basement

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why was 6 afraid of 7? because 7 is a bully. every day 7 ate 6's books and punches him. 6 would go to 9 but today 7 ate 9

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How many Wal-Mart employees does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Just one, assuming he can reach it safely.

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Two women were sitting together, quietly.

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Your mother is so old that she is dead.

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What did the passive-aggressive woman do to her husband? She killed him. As it turns out, the slight passive-aggressive behavior she was showing was actually an early warning sign of a dangerous sociopathic mental disorder. The authorities are looking for her as we speak.

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What do a grape and a plane have in common? They both have wings... except for the grape!

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? Blind.

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Kumquats, daffodils, and potato salad.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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