Why didn't the firefighter put out the fire? Because he wasn't a very good firefighter.

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My mom caught me masturbating.

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A Priest in a Rabbi walk into a bar. They talk about religion.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The horse says, "I have cancer."

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What did the duck say when it walked into the house? This isn't where I live.

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how many moms can you fit in a bathtub? as many as you want

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how did the little girl die cancer

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How do you make a bllind person cry? Slowly cut off their toes.

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What did the elephant say to the goldfish? Nothing. Animals are unable to speak and fish aren't able to live on land

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What do you call Santa's helpers? Chinese factory workers, who live in impoverished conditions, work up to 16 hours a day, earning slave wages. God damn you, Steve Jobs and Mattel.

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What do you call the alarm system in a failing inner-city school? A dumbbell!

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Why did the cop not arrest the driver? The Driver shot him 2 minutes earlier.

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Whats worse then this joke? Its punchline.

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What happened when the joke was bad? crippled up like cancer of the eye

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why did the black man buy a gun? he was a hunter.

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A man and a woman are alone, the man holds her down and says I'm going to rape you! The woman replies I'm not into that and leaves unharmed

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IF UR READING THIS EXPECTING A GOOD JOKE HERE GOES.... WHY DID THE CUP SAY HELLO GET IT ? I DONT

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whats harder than watching a dog get hit by a bus? my boner..

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Knock knock Who's there? Police Police who? You're under arrest, open up or we'll knock your door down

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What do you call someone in Manhattan who goes to see a Broadway show and then stops in at a local bar for a few drinks? A taxi, if they request you do so.

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Q: Why did the man have no legs? A: He lost them when his humvee hit a roadside bomb during his last tour in Iraq.

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How many years old is Chuck Norris? The same amount of years that it has been since he was born.

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Whats worse than being arrested for a crime you didn't commit? Teenage pregnancy.

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What did Helen Keller get for Christmas? A read along book

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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