Knock, Knock. I have no door.

What do you call a horse with out ears? A horse with out ears?

Hey Nerochan, how high is your IQ?

sooo.how do you get a bonner when your in a room with lady gaga???? you tell lady gaga to turn around and you think of brittany spears bending over get it nahhh probably not

How to confuse a blonde. Buy 14 monkeys dye them purple and orange and hide them in her wardrobe

What did the monkey say to the garbage collector? Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAAA

two guys walk into a bar, the third one ducks.

a man walked into a bar "ouch"

what did the man see in the mirror? Nothing, he was blind.

If life throws you melons you might be dyslexic, but you also might not be.

According to astronomy, when you wish upon a star, you're actually a few million years late. That star is dead. Just like your dreams.

Man who wrote "The Hokey Pokey" died. Hard part was getting him into the coffin. They put his left leg in and then the trouble started..

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven has a hook for one of his hands carries a chain saw in the other an gets into six's dreams...thats just scary

Why did the girl fall off the swing? She got shot.

Do is the Most Famous Line on youtube Answer- Do the Flop

A teacher notices one of her students clutching a cat. She asks him why. The boy, tearfully, explains that he heard his father tell his mother that he was going to eat her pussy when the kids left for school. The teacher laughs and, the class being 10-11 years old thereby at an age approaching biological curiosity, decides to mix this in with a sex education video she was planning on showing them a few weeks later. She then phones the boy's parents who come to collect the cat while reassuring the boy that it is in no danger. The cat was popular with the boy's classmates and they would often go to visit him as a result. Many years later, just after the boy started attending university, the cat was put to sleep at the age of 13 due to liver cancer. The boy placed a Facebook post in honour of his feline friend, which was spotted by a former classmate of his in a routine search who happened to be attending the same university. They ended up reacquainting and beginning a sexual relationship, which was how the boy lost his virginity and eventually blossomed into a 37-year marriage resulting in three children.

Q:why do bananas where sunscreen? A:beacause they peel!!haha

Two goldfish are sat in a tank, one says to the other 'I forgot who you are' to which the other replies 'I forgot what you said'.

A fish swims up stream for his natural spawning cycle. The fish was out of shape and died from heart failure.

Agricultural production fell significantly.

What do you call a black man who is poor, homeless, and HIV positive? Unlucky.

A guy comes to a doctor and says: - Doctor, lately I'm having this dream where I kill my father and rape my mother. What does it mean? - Nothing.

Why did the little girl get a haircut? A; she has cancer.

That moment where the screen shouts "HE MAN" And you look at the guy and go... Hmm did they say He-Man or She-Man? HE MAN!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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