- Anti Joke

Why was the fish swimming on the water? Oh wait it's dead

peter charastabopouloulous

I love you You love me Barney gave me HIVS It started with a hug and ended on the floor IVE BEEN RAPED BY A DINOSAUR!

What's a zombie's favourite dessert? I don't know, but I'll give you 50 bucks to go and ask one.

What did the Vampire say to the pastor? Nothing. You have to be real to talk

Q: What's black and blue and hates sex? A: The 8-year-old boy tied up in my garage.

Why did the fat guy get a gun? Because he was tired of all the fat jokes...

What did Connor say to the fat man? Dude ur extremely fat.

How do you upset a builder? Kill all his family.

Why did Hitler kill six million Jews? Because one of them looked at him funny.

what happens when two small children jump into a pool full of pedophiles? They splash around and have fun

osama bin ladens hiding spot

Doctor: your mom has cancerous aids Me:sob

roses are red, violets are blue. Barack Obama says, nice to meet you.

How did the priest die? Masterbation

What's so sad about a bus with mentally handicapped children falling off a cliff? There was one empty seat.

What did the cop do when he saw two Mexicans buying coke? Warned them of the health risks of drinking carbonated soft drinks.

A blind man walks into a bar. Then a chair. Then a table. (TD)

Q. What is worse than having 100 dead babies nailed to a tree? A. Having 100 dead trees nailed to a baby.

omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water omg water whew, i was thirsty!

Why did the car stop? It ran out of gas.

Roses are red, violets are blue, Flappy Bird is no where near as annoying as you!

Jesus was nailed to the cross by Roman guards... His disciples were kept behind a line of guards and they could not hear Jesus speak. They can see he was saying something, so they had to get closer to hear what he was saying. John dodged a guard and ran towards Jesus, but a guard cut his leg off with a sword... Peter ran for it and got past John but another guard cut off one of his legs... Matthew saw this opportunity to dodge both guards and jets past both John and Peter and gets to the foot of the cross... Jesus looks down at Matthew and says, "Matthew.... I can see your house from here!"

keep your eye off me if you dont look at me, how do you know i looked at you? there is a mirror

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

Want more? You might be interested in...

Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops