What did the left nut say to the right nut? Nothing

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This message is boring. There is no joke. There is no punchline. You can stop reading now.

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: Did you hear about the Polish Helicopter crash? The pilot and three passengers died.

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Q: Why did the singer stop singing? A: Someone threw a car at her face.

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What's worse than 1000 babies tied to a tree? 1 baby tied to 1000 trees.

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Blarg

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Q-How do you kill an elephant? A- An elephant gun Q- How do you kill a blue elephant? A- A blue elephant gun Q- How do you kill a red elephant? A- Strangle it until it turns blue then use a blue elephant gune Q- How do you kill a purple elephant?

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A Black man and an Asian man are at a bar. They have a few drinks and then leave.

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A man walks into a bar. We see him as he approaches the register wearing a dark hoody. The surveillance camera seen here catches a glimpse of the man's face appearing to be a white male with mustache and beard. As you can see the man opens the register and takes the money before the bartender can get to him. If you have any information about this crime please call crime stoppers at 1-800-GET-HELP. In other news, the DOW JONES reached a record high today as investors in China begin working on keeping the economy from plundering.

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My butt!!!!!!!!

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why?

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Knock knock. Who's there? It's the police. Your father's been taken to county jail for his third DUI.

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Why did the black man cross the road? Because he lived an worked on opposite sides of the road, and so consequently needed to cross the road to work, and provide an income for his family, so they could have fresh food, clean water, and have money to pay the bills such as the mortgage so they didnt become poor and homeless, which would inevitably lead to illness and an early death for them all.

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A guy walks in to a bar and says "ow"

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Whats the difference between a black baby and a white baby? the black baby is black

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What do you get when you cross a tho with a mas THOMAS!!!!!

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Why did Helen Keller cross the road? To end her misery.

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When life throws you melons you might be dyslexic.

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(Man #1): Do you know how I know you're gay? (Man #2): How? (Man #1) When I kiss you, you kiss me back...

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what's red and smells like water? Red food-coloured water.

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What's worse than a truckload of dead babies? Wait a week.

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What do you call a cow in the grass... A cow in the grass... Dumbas*

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Charlie Sheen walks into a bar, he relapses.

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what do men with small penises use as condoms? appropriately sized condoms.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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