A grasshopper walks into a bar. The bartender picks up a newspaper and squishes him

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead

A man and woman was sitting at a bar. The man bought the woman a roofied drink and she has never been seen again.

A man walked into a bar and it hurt.

I had a joke about a tie, but it wasn't funny.

Why'd Sam run away Because charlie bit his finger

How do you make a baby cry? Hit it with a brick.

How do you fit 45 Jews into a car? 5 in the car 40 in the ashtray.

Jared Gough is a slut

If a tree falls in the forest does anybody really care?

What's worse than 1000 babies tied to a tree? 1 baby tied to 1000 trees.

So a man walks into a bar, he meets a few friends, has a few beers, and at the end of the night he calls a cab to drive him home

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whats funnier than drews nose .... ??

Why does your mother not love you anymore? Because she was in a tragic car accident 5 years ago and is now deceased and is therefore incapable of love.

Adam gives a new view of roid rage

What did Death say to Life? "Look, I respect that you waited till after I broke up with Sandy to ask her out, but it's still a little akward for me, so although there are no hard feelings, it's probably better if we keep our distance from each other for awhile."

whats worse than not getting what you want for christmas? a child melester

Q: how do you get a girl with one arm to fall out a tree? Wave and wait for her to wave back.

What's worse than a truckload of dead babies? Wait a week.

Congratulations, sir. The judge has determined that the charges of traffic violation against you were indeed incorrect, and you will be given a large sum of cash for your wasted time.

What do you call an alligator in a vest? An amphibious mammal wearing clothes. Why would you ask me that.

Knock knock Who's there? I don't know go check.

Ok, I'll go ask someone else.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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