Q: How many cantaloupes can you fit into Jackie Chan's basement? A: 4

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how many babies can you fit in a bass drum? 19.

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John:Why couldn't the T-Rex clay his hands? Billy:Because his arms are too small! John:no he's extinct dumbass

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Q: If Jack Bauer is partially gay, then what are you? A: His sidekick -Ryan Vallee

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Bill: Did you hear someone said you sounded like an owl? Dave: Who?

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What do you call an indian who is underwater? A scuba diver.

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I got a joke. What did the Platypus say to the Policeman?" "What a ridiculous question, Platypus's can't talk.

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THERES AN APP FOR ANTI JOKES ? now thats not funny !

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What's the best part of having a doctor for a best friend? The sex.

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How many jews can you fit in a car? That depends on the volume of the car and the size of the people involved - different cars are of different sizes and can fit a different number of people. For instance, you could probably fit more than 20 midget jews in a van but you could probably not fit as many overweight jews in a coupé. However if you put some effort into getting as many standard sized people, in this case jews for reasons unknown, into a standard size sedan you should be able to fit about seven or eight in the car itself and one in the trunk, making a total of nine or ten.

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What did Santa get for a young boy? A gun. What did Santa get for the young boys sister? Nothing, the boy shot Santa. Who sent out presents the next Christmas? Not Santa.

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A man walks into a bar, then he realized he didn't have any money, so he walked out.

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get on your knees and make a donut face:)

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i joined the nazis... but 2 days later i found out i am a jew

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A blind man walks into a pole.

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What did the black man say to the latino man? Nothing he was far to busy trying to get a cab to his office meeting for his board of directors do not appreciate tardiness

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q. what did the fat guy get from burger king a. heart disease

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How do you make a teacher cry? Shit in their water bottle.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 murdered 4 and 5 then raped 10

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How many cows does it take to swim on land? 4.2

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Ask me if i'm a tree... "Are you a tree?".... No

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The graduate with a Science degree asks, "Why does it work?" The graduate with an Engineering degree asks, "How does it work?" The graduate with an Accounting degree asks, "How much will it cost?" The graduate with a Liberal Arts degree asks, "Do you want fries with that?"

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Hey, want to hear a joke? Women's Rights

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whats green and has wheels? grass i lied about the wheels

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops