There is a tiger in front of you a lion behind you and a bear beside you what do you do? Get of the marry go round

thumb_up thumb_down +28

What is worse than a bus falling on you? A bus with Mama June inside it falling on you.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

What's after 9/11? 9/12

thumb_up thumb_down +28

What do you call a snake with no arms? Normal. What do you call an amphibian with no arms? A caecilian. What do you call a girl with no arms? A poor, poor soul that is unfortunate enough to have had an amputation when young. Now, she can't go in public without being stared at. She can't catch herself when she trips. She can't ride a bike, bake cookies for her family, or be a NASA astronaut like she always dreamed. She is the normal ASDF Movie character.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

get on your knees and make a donut face:)

thumb_up thumb_down +28

There once was a man from Nantucket, whose dick was so long he could provide women with more pleasure than the average male.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

thumb_up thumb_down +28

What did the police say to the black man who just shot his wife? You are under arrest

thumb_up thumb_down +26

How u know when ur sister have periods... Fathers dig taste like blood

thumb_up thumb_down +26

How many Weasleys does it take to screw in a lightbulb? 2

thumb_up thumb_down +26

ask me if i'm a tree. are you a tree? no

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Why did the Chicken cross the road? Because, the Farmer had treated the Chicken and the rest of his family with great distaste, thus angering the Chicken to the point of rebellion against the Farmer with hopes of inspiring the other abused farm animals to act likewise.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

person 1: Did you hear about the black man that went to college? Person 2: no i haven't Person 1: either have I What's ironic is that they are both black

thumb_up thumb_down +26

what did the frog say to the princess? nothing because frogs do not possess sufficient linguistic skills to communicate with humans

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Roses are red, Violets are not blue, they're violet, which is why they're called violets.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

knock knock use the doorbell. our door has a hive of bees in it. three ambulances and a pest control squad was at the house five minutes later.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

what did the mom with cancer get for christmas? radiation poisoning

thumb_up thumb_down +24

"knock knock" "who's there?" "its your girlfriend, lets have sex"

thumb_up thumb_down +22

what ya call e dong withb eyes peeneyes

thumb_up thumb_down +22

knock knock who's there? boo don't do this joke again- i'll make you cry if you finish it don't cry it is just a knock knock joke teeheehee

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What do you call a black man sitting on your couch? A house guest.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Why do jewish women like to get their sons circumcised? They like anything 25% off.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What do you call a Mexican man in prison? A prison officer.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

A bear walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "What'll it be." The bear mauls his face off and kills several other patrons before police show up and fire three rounds in it's face.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops