What can Harry Potter NOT see with his glasses? His parents...alive.

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Hitler: Ve shud vork togeza and place stategic bombs overr your island. Castro: You are dead.

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Potato

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Why do women hate getting shot? They die.

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What's big, yellow and green? The sun, i was kidding about the green

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Why did the seal get confused when a spider tried to high five him? Because spiders have eight legs.

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What do you call a black man working for Bank of America? A successful individual.

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A man walks into a bar. His friend follows him in, but the first man doesn't know he's there. They both order a beer, then a couple strong shots. The first man then notices his friend, and they exchange high-fives. The man's friend says, "Hey, how ya doin?" The first man says, "Okay, I guess, but I forgot the punchline." So the second man orders his friend the strongest drink, and the weakest. He replies, "Me too, Joe. Meeeeee, too."

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h

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I raped someone in my basement... ...Just Kidding!... ...I dont have a basement

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YOU SUCK RYAN V!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! U SUCK BALLS!!!!!!!!!!!!

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What's the difference between a Ginger and a Brick? A ginger is a living organism.

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A Boy went up to his dad and told him he was hungry. His dad then beat him to death.

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Chuck Norris can bench 210 pounds.

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How can you upset Helen Keller? In Braille spell out that she can't see or hear the hunger games

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i'm on the sea food diet, a large proportion of my daily food intake consists of fish.

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Why didn't the lactose intolerant man get a drink at the bar? He was the designated driver.

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Hi Shelby!!

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What is the Pope's favourite dish to order from the local Indian take-away? Korma.

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Roses are red Violets are red Tulips are red Bushes are red Trees are red HOLY SHIT MY GARDEN's ON FIRE!!!!!

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A blind man walks into a bar. He orders a drink and after a couple hours he leaves. He's only color blind.

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Do you want to hear an anti joke? No.

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Did you hear the story about the divorcee who was concerned about ecology? Her husband had been hitting her. Good for her to get away from that kind of abuse.

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Q: What's the quickest way to a woman's heart? A: Through her ribcage.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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