What part of NO can't you understand? The part where you pronounce the 'N'.

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Two guys walk into a bar, they are both alchoholics and beat their wives.

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Why did Helen Keller cross the road? To end her misery.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, get in my bed so i can fu** you!

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Whats the difference between a black baby and a white baby? the black baby is black

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what's red and smells like water? Red food-coloured water.

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(Man #1): Do you know how I know you're gay? (Man #2): How? (Man #1) When I kiss you, you kiss me back...

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What's worse than a truckload of dead babies? Wait a week.

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When life throws you melons you might be dyslexic.

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A: how do u wake up lady gaga? B: you poke her face

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What do you get when you mix a mexican and a frenchman? A person of mixed racial heritage.

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hiya im writing this coz im drunk and ktieally slumped over the keyobard i feel relaly sick man and i dunno why i;lm teling you this, coz i should reallyt nbe om nrd ny noe. goodnight antijokers

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What did the deaf, dumb, blind, and mute child get for his birthday? Nothing, his parents hate him.

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A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us." The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute." The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us." The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look." The family performs an array of disgusting sexual acts. For the longest time, the agent just sits in silence. Finally, he manages, "That's a hell of an act. What do you call it?" And the father says, "It has no name."

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What's naughty and rhymes with CORN? Naughty corn.

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Two rabbits are being chased by dogs and hide in a log in the forest. The male pushes the female to the dogs which are at both sides of the log and gets off Scott free.

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Whats red and eats like dog? A fox.

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Whats black and has wheels a black man i lied about the wheels

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what do men with small penises use as condoms? appropriately sized condoms.

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Charlie Sheen walks into a bar, he relapses.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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Why didn't Timothy wish his dad a Happy Father's Day? His dad died yesterday in a car accident.

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Why'd the chicken cross the road? It didn't. Chickens are raised on farms, which are away from society. They are taken care of in pens, and have no way of escaping. Therefore it couldn't have crossed any roads.

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-What do you call the brown spots in your yard? -Dog shit.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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