What is the best school in Victoria? Lyndale.

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What do you call a mouse that sings? Justin Bieber

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What's the funniest part about this site? You're alone and reading this joke instead of getting a date.

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Have you seen the movie "Constipation?" No. It hasn't come out yet! Of course there is no such movie in production and no plans for such a movie exist.

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what is the difference between oral sex and anal sex? one has to deal with a butt

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What did the doctor say to the Jew? You have cancer.

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There are 4 people in a crashing plane, but there are only 3 parachutes. But, the teenage girl says she is depressed and cannot go on. The older woman breaks down into tears because she is reminded of her rough child hood. The two 21 year old twins start crying, too, because they were corrupted by their alcoholic father who would come home and abuse their family. As they were all crying, the two pilots and the flight attendant took the parachutes and jumped. The older woman realized she went to flight school when she was young so she took control. They were are happy and drank a little bit too much alcohol and got drunk. The pilot also drunk and crashed into a huge skyscraper. This catastrophe was later named 9/11.

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What's the best thing to say to a deaf person? Nothing. They are hearing impaired and won't hear you.

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If I lock you in a room and let a snake in under the door, what do you get? A problem.

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Q:What did the hillbilly say when he lost his tractor? A: Where is my tractor

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What did the man say when he turned on his car? AAAAAAGGGGGGHHHHHHH!

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whats dead and gone your nanas cat

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why didn't little johnny show up to school on friday? little johnny died two months ago from cancer. he hasn't been to school in a year.

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Whats Mary short for? Shes got no legs

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YEAH THEY DO.

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Why couldn't the man speak any English? Because not everyone can.

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dave lee travis walks into a radio station , plays some records , talks randomly , and a good time is had by all.

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How do you keep children off your lawn? Molest them

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di you hear about the man that got his whole left side cut off? no well he died

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Q: Why did the plane crash into a mountain? A: The pilot was a tomato.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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Why did the man jump off the bridge. Because he found his beloved wife cheating on him with his life-long friend that he meet when they both where in pre-school.

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Women's Rights

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Why don't Polish women use vibrators? They are extremely conservative Catholics.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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