Roses are red Violets are red Daisies are red Tulips are red Magnolias are red Weeds are red Carnations are red Crap, my gardens on fire.

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Roses are brown, violets are brown, who is s***ing in my garden?

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what is the difference between pizza and a Jew? pizza is a common Italian meal and a Jew is a member of a monotheistic religion

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boy1: whats blue and goes blub blub? boy2:i dont know boy1:a blue blub blub boy1: whats green and goes blub blub? boy2:a green blub blub boy1:no. there is no such thing called a green blub blub

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There once was a beautiful princess named Snow White who lived with seven dwarves in the forest. One day, and old hag approached her and offered her an apple. She bit into the apple, chewed, and said,"Wow, that's tasty. Is this a Golden Delicious?" The hag said, "Why yes, it is. I have a private orchard. Perhaps I'll let you see it some time." The two promptly resumed their lives.

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What's the worst thing a 13 year old could do? Have their Bar Mitzvah in Nazi Germany.

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How does a blind bit of difference differ from one that can see?

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Friends are like potatoes. When you eat them, they die.

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a man walked into a bar "ouch"

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Why wasn't Justin Bieber allowed in the men's bathroom? It was closed for maintenance.

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Oh my God, my friend just got hit by a truck. Lets go get ice cream

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What did a cat said to another cat? Nothing because cata dont talk.

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What did the boy with no arms or legs get for Christmas? A bike with no handle bars or pedals.

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in the begining... god made some stuff

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The ability to beleive it's butter. Oh shit, wrong site

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What do you call a fat ethiopian. Impossible

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I'm a schizophrenic, And so am I.

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what happens during a climax apples

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A British man walks into a dental office.

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Why did the cookie go to the docter? Because he was dieing of terminal cancer.

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crime in multi story is wrong on so many levels!

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Why was Superman white? Because Jerry Siegel is a racist.

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if a kayak was stuck in a tree with its headlights on, how many pancakes stacked will it take to get to the moon? none because snakes dont have armpits

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When I see Debra walking her dog in the morning I often ask myself whose walking who!?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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