Q: Why was six afraid of seven? A: Because of Kevin Spacey's chilling performance.

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Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get surgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

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In Soviet Russia ? ??? ??? ????????.

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What's black and white and eats like a horse? A zebra.

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Why did the child die? Natural causes.

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I'm so hungry I feel I would be able to ingest large quantities of food.

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A boy walks into a haunted cematery. Zombies eat him.

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I had a grammar lesson yesterday. I learned how to speak more good.

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Person1: Why did the chicken cross the road? Person2: I dunno.-. to get to the other side? Person1: :( I dream of a better tomorrow where a chicken can cross the street without having his motives questioned

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What's brown and sticky? A stick.

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Romney 2012

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there were 2 sausages in a frying pan. One sausage says it sure is hot in here. The other one says WTF a talking sausage!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because once it had inadvertently escaped the farm it was being kept on it was startled and with no concept of road and pavement happened to traverse a road, with no real motive.

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without laughing try to say " i hate bubble" with a dull face

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person 1: Did you hear about the black man that went to college? Person 2: no i haven't Person 1: either have I What's ironic is that they are both black

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whats 2+2? 4

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One time i ate a hamberger than an hour later i sneezed but i dont think it had anything to do with the hamberger.

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What did T Pain say to the skipper of his yacht? I'm on a yacht

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Diseases show if a prerson lacks vitamins and minerals.

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Guy: Im bisexual. Girl: Im thermosexual. Guy: ? Girl: Im only attracted to hot things. Which isnt you.

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You're in a room with your friend, and you see some one being eaten by a monster. Who's getting eaten? No one, monsters aren't real.

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Why did the woman cross the road? She didn't. They are no roads in the kitchen.

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What do you call a Mexican man in prison? A prison officer.

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knock knock use the doorbell. our door has a hive of bees in it. three ambulances and a pest control squad was at the house five minutes later.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops