Q: Where does a hooker go for her footlong? A: Subway

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A ninja walks into a bar the bartender asks "what would you like?" The ninja says "i'll have two green eyes" the bartender says "we dont have green eyes this is america" so the ninja is so mad that he goes home and brutally beats his wife with a spatula.

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A duck walks into a bar, and the bartender says "what'll it be?" The bartender is then sent to a medical clinic after letting several wild animals into his bar and proceeding to feed them alcoholic drinks. He is diagnosed with schizophrenia.

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Q. Why Did The Blond Have The Biggest Boobs In The Third Grade? A. Because She's 21

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what did the man see in the mirror? Nothing, he was blind.

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Why wasn't Justin Bieber allowed in the men's bathroom? It was closed for maintenance.

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If life throws you melons you might be dyslexic, but you also might not be.

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According to astronomy, when you wish upon a star, you're actually a few million years late. That star is dead. Just like your dreams.

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Ask me if i am a tree are you a tree? no

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12

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What's the difference between video games and a naked chick? The Holocaust.

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What is the difference between Michael Jackson and Neil Armstrong? Neil Armstrong was the first man to walk on the moon, and Michael Jackson molested boys.

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The Irish man was sober.

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? "Poker Face"

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a car drives off a cliff whos driving? an asin woman!

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Have you ever noticed that when geese fly in a V, one side is long than the other? Do you know why that is? There are more geese on that side

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Q. How do you break into a store that's closed? A. You walk in, I was lying about it being closed.

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Q.whats the worlds funniest joke???? A.not this one this ones crap

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What do you call a guy being followed by about 30 others with high powered rifles? A military general serving for his country.

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What is the difference between a black man and a park bench? A park bench is an inanimate object whereas a black man is a human being with rights.

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Q. On a scale of 1-100, how immature are you? A. 69.

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Two Penn-State Advisors walk into a butt.

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Bob Bob Bob Bob Bob Bob Bob Bob What What the hell are you doing here

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? She is blind and is therefore ineligible for a driver's license.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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