How do you kill somebody instantly? Make them smell Smelly mcD's socks.

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Why couldn't Jimmy drive the tractor? Because he didn't have any arms or legs. Why didn't he have any arms or legs? Because Jimmy was a Potato.

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What is the most hardest math known to man kind? 1+1=?

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A woman walks out of the kitchen, she gets slapped by her sexist husband.

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What looks like a 50p and has a narrow back?

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What did the Farmer say to his tractor? Most likely his life story, Farmers arn't always the most popular.

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A man walks into a bar, and orders a drink. He reaches into his back pocket, but cannot find his wallet. The man was pick pocketed by a skilled thief on his walk to the bar. The man quickly makes calls to cancel his credit cards and minimize the financial loss.

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What's red and smells like blue paint? Red paint.

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What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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Why cant madeleine mccann play ps3? ive only got an xbox

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A guy is walking on the beach one day when he stubs his toe on something shiny. Digging in the sand he finds an old, tarnished lamp. He takes it home and liberally applies polish, then puts it on his mantlepiece, it completes the look he was going for in his room and he feels like all his wishes have come true. His wife dies in a car accident later that day.

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Your mom is so dumb that she doesn't get this joke

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Q: What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the water? A: Drowning.

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why did the nazi eat the jew? He didn't

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was a woman...

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To try and beat the oncoming car.

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A: Knock! Knock! B: Who's there? A: Kitchen B: Kitchen who? A: GET THERE!

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Why is One direction the best thing in the world? Becuz when 5 hot guys met each other they... Sorry I got lost in Zayn's eyes again! Now what were we talking about??????

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What do you call a highschooler who smokes weed, shops at the mall, and has date-raped one girl so far? Popular.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Luke Futie

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Have you heard the joke that they don't tell retarded people? You haven't? Well then alright let me tell you because it's actually quite amusing.

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Where did Suzie go during the bombing? Everywhere

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I have read and agree to the Terms of Service

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What did the baby say to the banana? -- "mama!"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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