Why did the mother have a club in her hands covered with red liquid? She spilled her bloody murry while playing golf.

Sorry boss

When I'm sad I cut myself... another slice of cheesecake.

you will now laugh.

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's house? Yes, but he hasn't.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it had cancer.

knock knock. Who's there? Jehovah's witness. *Door Locks*

whats worse than having your bike stolen? Getting raped

The priest, rabbi and Lady Gaga walk into a bar. Lady Gaga performs on stage, while the priest and rabbi listen.

There was once a joke without a proper ending and so

What did santa claus say when he saw a girl standing on the corner? Ho Ho Ho... ;)

Penis-Pump

A man walks into a bar. Q: What's the apple doing on your head? A: Peach? It's not pear. It's banana.

Your social life

How do you spell Mississippi with out an i? You can't because removing an i from the word Mississippi would cause it to be spelled incorrectly.

What did Helen Keller see on her trip? Nothing

A blonde walks into an electronics store. She asks the clerk how much a television costs. He said that they don't serve blondes. The blonde files a lawsuit and is victorious by ruling of descrimination.

what did helen keller say when she dropped a box on her toe. nothing. helen keller cannot speak

What do you say if you see your TV floating in the middle of the night? I'm not sure, but I would probably have nightmares for a couple weeks.

A woman walks into a bar. She gets hit on by every guy in the bar. After hours of being hit on she finally has enough and asks the guys to stop. The guys Say "ok im sorry". She leaves.

what did the black man say to the white man? hi

Where's my tractor?

Tommy has no arms and legs. What did he get for Christmas? Cancer

How many cows does it take to swim on land? 4.2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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