Where's my tractor?

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i have a white dog on my and have the strangest boner

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What did the three bears say when rhey discovered goldilocks? Nothing. They mauled her to death.

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what do u call a gay bird a gaybird

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Segregation

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This site is easy to upload to...

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A guy named Dick goes into a bar and the barman says: - "hey, show my your dick" - "show you my what?" asks Dick. - "your dick!" - "oh! no, I'm shy"

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whats worse than bitting into a apple a finding a worm? bitting into ur apple an finding out u have just killed noddy who was hiding in ur apple

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How much cocaine did Charlie Sheen snort? Enough to kill 3 and a half men.

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Q. What's the difference between a movie star and a manikin? A. Nothing.

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You know whats funnier than 24? What? 25.

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What's funnier than a dead baby? A dead baby in a clown suit

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Does this napkin chloroform?

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wheres a place a cancer patient cant go? the hairdressers

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An old lady and her son walk into a hospital, only to find it covered in TRICERITOPS SHIT!!!!

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Homework.

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why did the cookie go to the docter he felt crumpie

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What is white on top and black on bottom? Society

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*you're

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What's worse than 1,000 babies stapled to 1,000 trees? 1001 babies stapled to 1001 trees.

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No, but it was a nice chance to pretend to, that was the scheme part I might have mentioned, people never figure out that you are fucking them over at the present, if you tell them you fucked them off in the past, they start thinking backwards, often ignoring those tiny details straight in front of them. Listen, call me a bit paranoid, but who the hell is Septimus and AzureDragon or whatever the fuck his little geek name was?

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What do you say to a very ambitious dyslexic child? You're ambition is inspiring and I encourage you to follow your dreams. Some of the worlds greatest people, including Albert Einstein, Thomas Edison, and Winston Churchill were dyslexic. Your drive is much bigger than your disorder.

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What's the difference between a computer and a television?

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anne hatthaway

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops