What number comes after 29? 30.

A Jewish guy walked into a bar... and said "ow"

Knock Knock Who's there I have Alzheimer's I have Alzheimer's who? Knock Knock

What do you call a black person with a million dollars? A millionaire.

How do you wake up your snoring friend? Cut his feet off.

A black man walks into a bar. The man behind him ducks.

A muslim bought tickets for a 3pm flight. It was 11am, so in the mean time, he went to a bar to loosen up. His bomb vest accidently went off early, killing everyone in the bar. The flight arrived on-time in San Fransico.

There once was a squirrel. He lost his nuts.

How many Wal-Mart employees does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Just one, assuming he can reach it safely.

Knock, Knock... Who's there An abandoned baby

LOL May Wong

A man walks into a bar. He then meets some friends and has a rather enjoyable night.

Your mother is so old that she is dead.

What do you call a guy who hangs around with musicians? A groupie.

A girl asked a guy if he thought she was pretty, He said 'No'. She asked him if he would want to be with her forever. He said 'no'. She then asked him if she were to leave would he cry, Once again, he replied 'no'. She had heard enough. As she walked away, tears streaming down her face the boy grabbed her arm and said.. 'Asking emotionally charged hypothetical questions that are completely irrelevant to the prior conversation is known as fishing for compliments. Except, your tears seem to reflect a more serious inner emotional neediness. I suggest you seek a psychologist.'

Why God isn't a woman? Because Moses wouldn't last it 40 days on the mountain if that was true. And he also wouldn't come back with only 10 rules.

That guy is so lame, he needs a wheelchair to go places.

why did the boy fall of the bridge? He got shot in the head.

Knock knock Who's there Ummmm....me u r looking right at me O yeah Ummm... Now what U knocked? No. O Ye Ok Alright cya

Ian is cutie!!!!!;)

Q: What's the quickest way to a woman's heart? A: Through her ribcage.

A priest and a rabbi walk into a bar and decide to have a drinking contest. Who won? The rabbi. The priest died of alcohol poisoning later that night.

Kumquats, daffodils, and potato salad.

Potato

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...