What did the beaver say to the other beaver? Nothing because beavers are wild, indigenous species thus incapable of speech.

what happened after 9/11?? 9/12.

Umm Q Umm 69 Best one ever

no

what is yellow and cant swim? a bull doser what has 4 wheels and is green? grass, i lied about the wheels what is worse than finding a worm in ur apple? having cancer

Why can't the blonde dial 911? Because the burglars tied her up and gagged her before they robbed the house and she couldn't do anything until one of the neighbors found her and untied her.

Sarah got hit by a bus.... Knock Knock Who's there? Not Sarah

What's 9+10=? 19

Roses are red Violets are blue I'm not good at poems Nice tits

Roses are black Violets are black Everything is black. ~Stevie Wonder

Why does Susie fall off the swing? I shot her in the head with a pistol.

Your mom is so ugly she plans on using you college funds for getting plastic surgery

poo poo you you doo doo too too

What did the black kid get for Christmas? Marijuana

So a man walks into a bar, he meets a few friends, has a few beers, and at the end of the night he calls a cab to drive him home

Facebook...

How do you make a blonde scream? Set her on fire.

What does ms colot like to eat? Pants

Why did the chicken cross the road? Segregation

What's worse than a truckload of dead babies? Wait a week.

42

What happens when you ask a blind guy to drive you somewhere? What happens if you ask a blind guy to drive? You will end up in a four way accident with 8 people dead 2 of which children and 1 baby. You might survive but the blind guy won't so you will have to go to court for him on the issue. You realize that you are terrible when it comes to the law and you get yourself thrown in jail for 2 years. When you get out you are so tired of getting butt raped that you go out and do it to someone else. Then you go back to jail an the process repeats it's self because this is the American justice system. We could work on it a little bit. But yeah, don't ask a blind guy to drive, your butt will thank you.

What is Beethoven's favorite fruit? While Beethoven enjoyed many different varieties of fruit, he found strawberries the most appealing.

What was the pirate movie rated? PG-13 actually because, despite the potentially graphic nature of the previews, the creators scaled down mature content so that it could reach a wider audience.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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