Light Yagami. I'm a gay light bulb :D

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Why is One direction the best thing in the world? Becuz when 5 hot guys met each other they... Sorry I got lost in Zayn's eyes again! Now what were we talking about??????

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Whats worse than a repeated Anti-joke This One

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Why are anti-jokes so funny?

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Where did Suzie go during the bombing? Everywhere

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? 452

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What do you call a highschooler who smokes weed, shops at the mall, and has date-raped one girl so far? Popular.

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how do you drown a blonde? strategically place a scratch and sniff sticker at the bottom of a swimming pool (or just a regular sticker because, quite honestly, they won't be able to tell the difference as the water fills their lungs)

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Jesus was nailed to the cross by Roman guards... His disciples were kept behind a line of guards and they could not hear Jesus speak. They can see he was saying something, so they had to get closer to hear what he was saying. John dodged a guard and ran towards Jesus, but a guard cut his leg off with a sword... Peter ran for it and got past John but another guard cut off one of his legs... Matthew saw this opportunity to dodge both guards and jets past both John and Peter and gets to the foot of the cross... Jesus looks down at Matthew and says, "Matthew.... I can see your house from here!"

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A man is about to rape a girl. Before penetration he carefully and correctly applies a condom as he practices safe sex and is not yet ready to father a child.

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What did the baby say to the banana? -- "mama!"

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Why did the kid drop his lollipop? He got hit by a bus.

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What's worse than getting a detention? Slavery...just kidding that was a good thing!

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What did the prostitute eat for lunch? Nothing because she was too busy performing oral sex for money.

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Why did Superman stop collecting stones? Did he ever? Moral: Yes but his kryptonite collection seemed to slow him down at times... until he stopped...

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What did one deaf mute say to the other deaf mute?

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What did the apple say to the apple? Nothing, they're apples.

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why did the poet kill the blackchicken? as a source of inspiration for his poultry

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A man walks into a bar and sees a jar filled with money. He asks the bartender, "What`s all this money for?" The bartender replies, "It`s Breast Cancer Awareness month and we are collecting donations." The man puts in $5, and continues on with his night.

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space is fun

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know. I didn't ask him.

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Why do women get pregnant? Beacuse it hurts and they deserve it.

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Knock knock Who's there? Johnny Johnny who? Names don't matter. Now shut up and let me in before I kill your family

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A horse walks into a bar. the bartender says "hey. get out."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops