What did the cripple kid get for Christmas? Cancer. You know what he got the next the next Christmas? Nothing he died.

What's worse than a worm in your apple? Two worms in your apple.

Why did the addict choke himself with a trash bag? His family couldn't afford a funeral and it was the quickest way to disappear.

what is long, black and looks like a curly-hair? A curly-hair

Why did the mom go to jail? She committed infanticide. lol.

Whats worse than the holocaust? Being a jew in the Holocaust.

A minor walks into a bar. He's not very good at limbo.

Q: What is a duck's favorite thing to smoke? A: Quack

How do you spell Mississippi with out an i? You can't because removing an i from the word Mississippi would cause it to be spelled incorrectly.

Whats worse than a mother of 3 children, jumping off a bridge, smashing into the metal roof of a large car and dieing on impact? A mother of 3 children jumping off a bridge, smashes into the metal roof of a large car, survives,, becomes paralyzed, and has to explain to her children, why she is in a wheel chair for the rest of her life.

That moment where the screen shouts "HE MAN" And you look at the guy and go... Hmm did they say He-Man or She-Man? HE MAN!

Uh, erm, uh...I don't know.

Penis

What did the white man say to the muslim? Hi

Ask me if I'm a tree. Are you a tree? No. Ask me if I'm a bush. Are you a bush? No.

How many blind people does it take to screw in a light bulb? Does it matter?

Whats yellow and cant swim? A bulldozer.

Two kids walked into a bar. One jumped over it

What's the diffrents beetween a carrot and a dead baby? One I like to eat in my soup, the other one s a carrot.

Q: How do you get a one armed blond of of a tree? A: You grab a ladder and help her down safely.

A black man walks into a bar. A few minutes later a jewish man enters. Next door, a twelve year old girl is crying over the tragic death of her mother due to terminal cancer.

Why are you reading this? You should be taking a shower, you smell like crap.

What's the difference between a Mexican and a bench? Its socially acceptable to sit on a bench.

A disabled man runs into a bar. He notices he's not disabled and realizes his mother lied to him his whole life.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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