What did the man say when he was having sex with his wife? Nothing. It turns out it wasn't his wife, he was cheating on her with his mistress, the woman he was having sex with now, thus destroying their marriage.

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What happens when you are a fat 37 year old virgin, with a small penis, poor bone structure, pale skin, a horrible personality, and no friends? You spend all night writing anti-jokes...will someone please like me?

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sometimes josh roberts sees how many things he can get in his bumhole befor is starts to bleed.

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What did the mushroom say to the pretty lady? Nothing, because it's a mushroom.

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A military serviceman returns home from a tour of duty to find his wife in bed with another man. He feels betrayed and files for divorce, then later meets a more faithful woman with whom he has a more fulfilling relationship.

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Why was Jimmy so upset? Because both of his parents died.

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GINGER PEOPLE

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What do you do when the dishwasher is broken? Fix it, call a repair man, call the landlord, do the dishes by hand or don't do them at all... your options are endless.

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There are 263 birds on a fence, a farmer shot 1 how many are left? 0 the rest flew away.

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why did the chicken cross the road? -----it didnt

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What's worse than finding a small cockroach in your drink? Finding a medium sized cockroach in your drink. What's worse than finding a medium sized cockroach in your drink? Genocide. What's worse than genocide? Finding a large sized cockroach in your drink.

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Justin Beiber and a speaker = no hearing within a 25 mile area

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How big is kevins Dick? Idk ask his mom!

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Why can't Helen Keller drive a car? Because she's dead.

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Immediately following his inauguration, Bush called Obama into the oval office for a private meeting and some words of advice. Bush and Obama shook hands as gentlemen do and then Bush asked if Obama wanted to hear a joke. Obama eagerly said yes, "Good..." Bush said, handing Obama a battered copy of the United States Constitution, "...the joke is in your hands", and with that Bush turned and left.

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What do you call Santa's helpers? Chinese factory workers, who live in impoverished conditions, work up to 16 hours a day, earning slave wages. God damn you, Steve Jobs and Mattel.

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How do you flatten a worm? Feed it to a little boy, and then drop a refrigerator on him.

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Why did the cop not arrest the driver? The Driver shot him 2 minutes earlier.

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What do you call a woman who loves sex and food? A fat wh0re.

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Why did the little boy drop his Ice cream? He had no arms(:

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What happened when the joke was bad? crippled up like cancer of the eye

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Why does it take more than one squirrel to change a lightbulb? Because they're so darn stupid!

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As for regarding the Win/Win/Win/sore ass kid comment below... Why not? There is too much Win in order to worry about some fucking soreass thats just gonna grow up to be a slut... RIGHT? Your friendly r*pist Neighborhood r*pist Moral: Man: "He or she who knows I am right, will be be the only one left" Btw, I am the Anti-God, what else can I be? You are the ones that killed Christ Ahahahahahaha! Political humor bonus because my satisfaction of owning you all and your entire screen. Are you Right Winged? Or wrong Winged?

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IF UR READING THIS EXPECTING A GOOD JOKE HERE GOES.... WHY DID THE CUP SAY HELLO GET IT ? I DONT

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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