- Anti Joke

why did the girl like d1ck? because d1ck was a nice boy

How do you get them out? Tortilla chips

Why did the girl ask her brother for aids? Because her room was a mess

What did the black kid get for his birthday? A bike, just what he asked for.

why was the girl screaming? She was getting raped from behind by her dad.

what is black and white and red all over a shot to death zebra

Q: Little black thing with a little red thing on it. What is it?! A: Ant with a broken nose...

Why did the man complain of pain in his ankle? Because several consecutive tissue samples of the area revealed a rapidly metastasizing neoplasm. Blood samples indicated the presence of what appeared to be Hodgkins Lymphoma. The man was very wealthy, however, and had world class doctors treat him. He then donated a vast portion of his wealth to research. 12% of the donated money went into studying the medicinal effects of Twinkies.

A small boy called peter got stuck up a tree, a man walks past and said "how did you get up there?" peter replies "i fell"

Q:whats yellow and flys through walls A:A magical Banana

imagine a world without santa ill make it easy, lookout the window

PFF! I hate that shit XD not saying that claymation cant be art, but that Plonsters or whatever is just something I dragged out of my head.

Why did the seal get confused when a spider tried to high five him? Because spiders have eight legs.

What is the difference between my elbow and my penis? I Cant lick my elbow

Why are fat people fat? Because they like food.

Knock Knock Come in

Two nuns walk into a bar. There is a monkey between them, that they are both holding hands with. The bartender looks to them, and says "Hello sisters, I am sorry, but we do not allow wild animals into the bar. He's gonna have to wait outside," to which one of the nuns responds, "Oh, do not worry, this is no monkey, this is one of our sisters." The bartender is very confused. He chuckles, and says "Alright, well then your sister is going to have to wait outside." The sisters look at each other confusedly, but take the monkey outside, put it on a leash, and tie it to a pole. They proceed back inside, have a few drinks, and leave. The next night, the bar is a little more crowded. The bartender looks up and sees the two nuns entering. He checks to make sure there is no monkey with them, and there is not, so he goes back to serving drinks. A few minutes later, the two nuns are at the front of the bar ready to order drinks. The bartender smiles at them, "No monkey this time?" he asks. "Not tonight," says one of the nuns. "Alright," says the bartender, "what can I get you?" "I'll take a double bourbon," says one of the nuns. "I'll have a gin and tonic, and she'll have the same" says the other nun, motioning to a rhinoceros on her left. "What the fuck!!" yells the bartender. "How did you get this inside?! Where did you even get a rhinoceros?" He realizes these questions are unimportant, and runs to call animal control. By the time he turns around, however, the rhinoceros is gone. He goes to talk to the bouncer. "Dude, why do you keep letting in wild animals?" asks the bartender. "The hell are you talking about?" asks the bouncer. "Last night, two nuns walked in with a monkey, and tonight they somehow got a rhino past you. You didn't see that??" the bartender snaps. "Three nuns came in last night, and three came in tonight. No monkey, no rhino," the bouncer tells him. Meanwhile, as they walked home to the convent, one of the nuns says "Man, I haven't been drunk in weeks." One of the other nuns turns to her and says, "Well, maybe you should stop turning into an animal every time we get into a bar."

69. Yeah- that's my street address.

I said I read te terms of service. I didnt

What does a squirrel get when it rains? It gets wet.

Why didn't the lactose intolerant man get a drink at the bar? He was the designated driver.

A terrorist walks into a bar and shoots the bartender.

-Knock Knock. -Come in.

A gay man walks into a bar has a few drinks then goes home without being recognized as a homosexual.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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