Q: Why did the man have no legs? A: He lost them when his humvee hit a roadside bomb during his last tour in Iraq.

why did the black child get sent to child services? because he has an abusive father and an alcoholic mother

What is worse than a Catholic priest being caught red handed raping 7 kids? 1. Thou shall not steal. 2. Thou shall be kindeth to thy neigbour... 3. Not attending to church is a sin... Moral: Catholic priests need to get their priorities straight... or gay, just not pedo!

12

Doorbell salesman.

Why couldn't the eleven year old get into the pirate movie? Because it was rated PG-14 and he was unaccompanied by a mature adult.

Why did the chicken cross the road? There was a wild dog on the other side, so he crossed the road to avoid potential danger.

a car drives off a cliff whos driving? an asin woman!

Knock Knock Who's there? No one was there. It was two birds flew into the door and died.

What do you call a group of white guys playing basketball in Philadelphia? Actually, that already seems like a pretty good summary of the situation.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

How do you stop a fire breathing dragon from breathing fire? Shove a hose down its throat.

Q: What do you call a man with no arms or legs in a pool? A: A man with no arms or legs in a pool.

Q: What is the difference between everything and nothing? A: everything! Moral: NOTHING!

Yo momma's so fat and thank god because I'm a chubby chaser.

If all the world was like Jesus...wouldn't we all die on crosses?

whats worse then a baby with out floaties?.......beating your grandma to death with a puppy

A 14 year old walks into a bar. The bartender yells "Hey, no minors allowed here!" A 14 year old walks out of a bar.

why was the girl screaming? She was getting raped from behind by her dad.

There is a tiger in front of you a lion behind you and a bear beside you what do you do? Get of the marry go round

There once was a man from Nantucket, whose dick was so long he could provide women with more pleasure than the average male.

What do you call a Jew in Harlem? It depends on what his name is. I advise procuring a polite introduction from a mutual acquaintance.

Knock Knock. Who's there? Child Protection Services. ...............

A: Knock knock (pause) A: Knock knock (pause) A: Knock knock B: (frustrated), I thought we had that damn thing fixed!!!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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