Why did the tomato blush? Because it began to ripen.

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What did the man bring home from Africa? AIDS.

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A man walks into a bar, unfortunately his brain condition killed him after the swelling in his brain reached a point where his family had to unplug him from a machine putting him in a medically induced coma.

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Q: What did one poor guy say to the other poor guy? A: We're both black

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What's the difference between a baseball player on the Yankees, and one on the Red Sox? One was named Jeff, the other wasn't.

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What do you call a whore? Kelsey cook duh

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the other monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Because he thought it was a game.

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FAP

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How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? It should only take one person to do this job regardless of hair color.

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Q: How many banana peels does it take to run down the street, true or false? A: Telephone poles don't have doors.

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Jesus was nailed to the cross by Roman guards... His disciples were kept behind a line of guards and they could not hear Jesus speak. They can see he was saying something, so they had to get closer to hear what he was saying. John dodged a guard and ran towards Jesus, but a guard cut his leg off with a sword... Peter ran for it and got past John but another guard cut off one of his legs... Matthew saw this opportunity to dodge both guards and jets past both John and Peter and gets to the foot of the cross... Jesus looks down at Matthew and says, "Matthew.... I can see your house from here!"

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Q: What has 1 eye and half of a pig's snout? A: A pig peeking around a corner.

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Kesley Ioannou not shopping.

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Why did Superman stop collecting stones? Did he ever? Moral: Yes but his kryptonite collection seemed to slow him down at times... until he stopped...

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What do you call a black man who sells drugs? A pharmacist.

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I have read and agree to the Terms of Service

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What do you call a black man with his doctorate in the field of marine biology? Doctor

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Alt F4

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What did the joke writer with A.D.D say refrigerator

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Why did little jennifer shit herself? Because she fell over.

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How do you jump off a bridge? You jump

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YOUR MOM JOKES ARE SO OLD because the last time i herd a ur mom joke i fell off my dinosaur...

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How many dead babies can you fit in a bath tub? 17

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Hey, Max!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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