Why was little Timmy an orphan? His family were slaughtered when he was three.

Knock knock Who's there? Prost Prost who Prostitute

There is a knock on the door. Little Jimmy comes dowstairs opens the door and standing in the door way is the axe wielding manic fromTexas Chainsaw.

A patient walks into a clinic and says, "Doctor, Doctor! I feel like a pair of curtains!" The doctor replies, "I have no interest in whether or not you feel like purchasing items to spruce up your home."

Which came first, The chicken or the egg? Well, Firstly, I suppose that depends on if we are discussing Creation or Evolution. If we are talking about Evolution, The Chicken must Logically have evolved from an egg laying creature, one which was similar to, but not quite a chicken, so, the first chicken hatched from the egg of said creature. However, if we are discussing Creation, there is no way to discern which the deity in question decided to create first, so, even odds. Therefore, Logically, there is a 75% chance the Egg came first. However, if we are discussing Chicken Eggs Specifically, the reverse is true, because the egg the first Chicken hatched from would not have been a chicken egg, it would have been the egg of another creature, a "proto-chicken" if you will. and so, in the evolution scenario, the Chicken came first. Still, in this situation, there are even odds as to which a creator may or may not have created first. Therefore, Logically, in this Scenario, there is a 75% chance that the Chicken came first

Women

your mom is so poor that she is unable to pay for your child care leaving you to have a terrible childhood, troubled adolescence, and eventually lie passed out in an alley after OD'ing off of heroin.

Why do teenagers, especially girls between the ages of 12-17 love Justin Bieber? Answer: Because he promotes himself worldwide and creates a fanbase large enough to promote his career thus increasing profits which provides him a better quality of life and great financial future

wanna hear a joke: women's rights

A blonde walks into a library. She is a commerce major.

what did the little girl with no arms or legs get for her birthday? a bike.

What's brown and rhymes with Snoop? Dr. Dre

What do you call a black man selling drugs? A pharmacist

What time is the dentist appointment? Time for you to get a watch

A baby crawls into an abortion clinic.

What is the difference between Charlie Sheen and Michael Jackson? One is dead, one is not.

What's funnier than somebody spitting in someone else's food? It's not even funny, it's just plain rude and disgusting.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It had the utmost desire to.

iPhone's. Amirite? That's not even an anti-joke. Just a joke.

How did bob Marley quit doing Drugs?

roses are red violets are blue however some roses are pink

Why was the black man scared to leave his house? Because he saw a load of mutated zombies outside his door trying to kill him. However, he realised that this was not possible and was not scared anymore. He went outside but got hit by a fridge and died...

Why didn't the chicken get to the other side of the road? Because chickens are in farms

what happens when you get ben roethlisberger, and a young college student? a very pleasant evening, helping ben cope with all the drama he has been in the past year leading him to the 2011 super bowl against the green bay packers.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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