wanna hear a good joke? neither do I

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Ask me if I am a potato Are you a potato No.

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whats made of wood and floats? everything made of wood floats

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Knock knock. Who's there? Black guy. Due to your skin tone I feel you may cause potential danger to me and my family, so for that reason I will not allow you to enter my home.

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Did you hear about the boy who got an AM radio? It took him a month to realize that he can play it at night too.

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What did the gravel say to the road? Give me the D.

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How do Chinese people get their names? From their parents.

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How did Helen Keller meet her husband? On a blind date.

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Goats are like mushrooms. If you shoot a duck, I'm scared of toasters

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What did Jeff say to the guy who stole his car? Can I have my car back.

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Your not having a bad day, your just doing everything wrong!

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Why was the guy on top of the van It was his funeral

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Knock knock Who's there? An elf. An elf who? An elf who wants to be a dentist.

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Terrorist jokes make me explode with laughter.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To kill a hooker and get his money back.

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in the begining... god made some stuff

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what happens during a climax apples

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Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps, "My friend is dead! What can I do?". The operator says "Calm down. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." There is a silence, then the man said "he has a pulse". The operator then calmly stated "we are sending a helicopter to air lift him out of there as we speak". The man got helicoptered to the nearest ER, and the doctors did their best to save him. He ended up having to go on life support for three years until his family members finally decided to pull the plug. The medical insurance didn't cover life support and the family went broke because of it.

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You know what isn't funny? AIDS. You know what is? Brittany Spears with AIDS...

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myspace

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Why can't santa fit down a chimney? No one can

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Why was the black man pulled over? He was going 10 miles over the speed limit.

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Why did the boy have a tumor? Because he had cancer.

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Where was Susie when the bomb exploded? Everywhere

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops