Q: why did the black man cry when he went to bed? A: he had just had a visit from the police and apparently his family had been tragically killed in a car accident.

Why did the tomato blush? It didn't - red is the natural colour for ripe tomatoes.

roses is red violet is blue i will smack you

why is 4 afraid of 5? Because Monkey's eat purple pineapples

Girl: Do you like me :D Boy: No Girl: =( Boy: You didn'y ask me if i loved you Girl: :D Do you love me Boy: Naw

What is worse than a fly in your soup? Getting hit by a train.

Beans beans, they're good for your heart, the more you eat the less at risk you become to such health problems as diabetes and heart attacks. The increased carbohydrates and antioxidant properties maintain a manageable balance for the body's digestive system to maintain a good constant internal environment.

Yo mama's so fat, she has low self-esteem.

Whats worse than being arrested for a crime you didn't commit? Teenage pregnancy.

Why did the guy throw a clock out his window? Because he was mentally unstable and needs help.

Two drunk men were in a bar fight, they smashed beer bottles on each others heads and walked away because it hurt.

How many years old is Chuck Norris? The same amount of years that it has been since he was born.

what have big boobs, and fat ass ? fat man

What did Don King do with his new boxers? Put them on with a respectable pair of trousers.

What happened to all of the happy birds flying over the field? They were all suddenly stricken by the bird flu and died.

Why couldn't Simon run? Because he had Cerebral Palsy.

21

69

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was crudely stapled to another chicken who insisted on doing so.

Your mom is so dumb that she failed to pass her 11th grade year, forcing her to drop out to get a GED and spend the rest of her life at a dead end job

Why did the black surgeon get fired? The hospital was low on funds due to the economic crisis, and had to let a few employees go.

A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

There are three types of people in this world: The stupid. And the ones that can't count.

What do you call a man with three arms and three legs and no nose. A highly unlikely instance that no one would believe is real.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...