How do you make a baby cry? Throw a brick at its face.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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Roses are red. Violets are purple. Haha. Purple.

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- I did your mom last night! - Thanks, Dad.

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Two women were sitting together, quietly.

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What do you call a man who has committed more than 10 crimes? Whatever his name happens to be.

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You wanna know something that's totally out of this world? The moon

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What do you call a sandwich that has sandwich on it? A sandwich.

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Why did John fall off the tree? We were throwing rocks at him.

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Why did Michael Jackson go to McDonald's? Because he was hungry.

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Ask me if I'm a truck. Are you a truck? You have HIV.

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Why is poop brown? Because you're a shit.

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What do video games and school have in common? Nothing, nobody likes school

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a rabbi,a priest and minister didn't walk into a bar. Bars are for fun and fun is for not completely insane brainwashed people.

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1234 5

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Me: "Dad! Can you make me a sandwich?" Dad: "Poof! You are now a sandwich."

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what did eminem say to dr.dre? nothing u idoits dr.dres dead he is locked in my basement

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How do you stop a clown from smiling? Hit him in the face with an axe.

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How do you confuse a black man? Paint him white.

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What did the passive-aggressive woman do to her husband? She killed him. As it turns out, the slight passive-aggressive behavior she was showing was actually an early warning sign of a dangerous sociopathic mental disorder. The authorities are looking for her as we speak.

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Why can't penguins fly? ......It is against their evolutionary state.

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asian drivers.

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What does AIDS smell like? AIDS has no smell. AIDS is a diease contracted though sexual contact with another being with the diease. It greatly increases the risk of infections and malignancy. Although AIDS has no smell, in the final stages large sores develope on the surface of the skin. This means you are going to die. Thus, HIV/AIDS has no smell.

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I raped someone in my basement... ...Just Kidding!... ...I dont have a basement

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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