Two goldfish are sat in a tank, one says to the other 'I forgot who you are' to which the other replies 'I forgot what you said'.

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How is the difference between a door? Its a chicken, because they don't have wheels.

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A squirrel got killed by getting hit by a truck haha its funny cuz the squirrel died

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What happened when the Asian girl got an 89 on her Test? Her parents kicked her out of their house.

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What do u call a women between to black guys? -loose

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why did the chicken cross the road?? to go shopping for some aspirin because one of his children recently developed a raging headache and it was only logical for him to go to the pharmacy that was conveniantly placed across the road.

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what colour is a frog green you idiot

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What did the Engineer say to the English major? Hey we went to the same school and got different degrees! Cool!

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What is big and white and will kill you if it falls from a tree? My d**k.

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There was an Englishman, an Irishman and a chest of drawers. The Englishman put a flask of coffee in the top drawer without even looking. Diane hates wrestling.

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Why did the mushroom go to the party? Because he was a fungi.

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Why was the panda sad? It's family died when China had an earthquake.

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What's dead? Your mum.

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Why were the sea hawks fans mad at the Super Bowl? Because why would you throw the ball if you have one yard to go

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What's the difference between a plum and a bunny? They're both purple. Except the bunny.

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100% of smokers die 100% of people die I am tied to a tree

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What do you call a former pope. Dead!

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What's worse than falling on concrete? Being eaten by futuristic mutant trees in a volcano

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How do you kill a dinosaur? You don't. It's already dead.

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Why was Timmy sad?

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What's funnier than a rock. A funny rock.

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Since little kids sleep with stuffed bears, do bears sleep with stuffed humans?

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a little girl is playing outside of her house when i man in a van approaches her and stops to ask if the girl will help him find his puppy and that he has some gandy. seeing as the girl has a great love for animals she gets in the van. the man and the little girl drive around until they find the puppy. the man is so overjoyed her rewards the girl with candy. he then drives her back to her house and she feels wonderful having helped the man find his puppy. the end.

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What's the difference between your dog and your mother? Your dog doesn't think you're a disgrace to the family

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops