Why did the fat prick post on the internet? Because he was MorningAfterBoy

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Knock Knock Who's there? Kconk Kconk who? Kconk Ohw Oh yeah, sorry mate, didn't recognise your voice! Come on up, I've got some lagers in the fridge.

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Do thumbs down me likes in this anti joke website?

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There is a knock on the door. Little Jimmy comes dowstairs opens the door and standing in the door way is the axe wielding manic fromTexas Chainsaw.

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What ruined the little boy's day? He drowned.

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A patient walks into a clinic and says, "Doctor, Doctor! I feel like a pair of curtains!" The doctor replies, "I have no interest in whether or not you feel like purchasing items to spruce up your home."

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What other than water contains H2O? The condensation reaction between two alpha glucose molecules to form Maltose.

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What did the man say when he turned on his car? AAAAAAGGGGGGHHHHHHH!

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What did Helen Keller say to the priest? Nothing, she didn't know he was there.

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CHIIIICKKIIIIIIIN!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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whats blue and can be seen in the sky? the sky.

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What's so funny about a heart attack? It's not kidney failure..

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What is green and is a dub dub. A green dub dub.

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Q: What sucks? A: Straws

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What did the 3 bears say when they saw goldielocks sleeping in their bed? Nothing. Bears can't talk so they ate her.

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says .... Hey, you shouldn't be in here; you're a big and powerful animal and any sudden movement could be dangerous for anyone around you. You have sharp hooves and we don't carry anything ergonomically designed for you to actually drink out of ... so, it's probably best that you just go ahead and get out of here. The irishman at the bar says to the bartender: Why are you talking to a horse as if it can understand you? They do not understand the spoken word and do not have the vocal chords to reply.

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This message is boring. There is no joke. There is no punchline. You can stop reading now.

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A duckling is following its mother, but gets separated. Noticing that her child is lost the mother duck calls out, and the duckling finds her quickly.

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What do black people eat for breakfast? Cereal.

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Why did the 15 year old girl not enjoy her taco? Because the man making her taco was kid napped and replaced with a female that forgot to put cheese on it.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, your tits are nice

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your mom is so gay that...wrong, a homosexual women is considered a lesbian.

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Women's Rights

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A man walks into a bar. Ouch.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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