how big is a midgets dick? i dont know but probably bigger then mine

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A man walks into a bar and says "ouch." It was an Iron bar.

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How did the man rape the woman? With his penis.

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why did the pirate not get in to the pirate movie it was rated arrrrrr

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how do you annoy people? make statuses from anti-joke.com

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A red house is red. A blue house is blue. What color is the green house? Clear they are made of glass.

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A traveler gets a flat tire on an old farm road. He goes to the door of the neasrest farm and knocks. The farmer and his beautiful 21 year old daughter answer the door. Traveler: "I'm sorry, but I have a flat. Is there any place I can stay until I get it repaired?" Farmer: "Why yes. Our church sponsors a homeless shelter and rehab center down the road.I can give you a ride there if you like?"

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There once was a man from Nantucket, Whose body parts were all adequate and thus could not perform any odd sexual acts upon himself.

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Why did the woman walk into the men's clothing store? She's a lesbian. Why did the man walk into the womens clothing store? He had to buy his mom a birthday present.

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Do you know what big feet mean. Big socks

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if a cat is mean and a dogs a bitch then what do u call your wife? A MEAN ASS BITCH

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Why was the boy praying? Because both of his parents had just been brutally murdered in front of him and he was analy defiled by the assailant and left alive to have live with the pain of seeing both of his parents be killed. He had also dropped his lollipop.

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babe whos moaning? are you with another woman? guy:god damn if you would stay in the kitchen we would never have any problems.

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i eat poop

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Yeah? You like that? Its like art for some.

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A man walks into a zoo. There is only one animal, a dog. It's a shitzu.

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A man walks into a bar. He hit his head so hard that he went into a coma.

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If it looks like chicken and tastes like chicken but Chuck Norris says it's beef, politely correct him. He is actually a very sensible fellow and will probably thank you for doing so.

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How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? It should only take one person to do this job regardless of hair color.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I ate your horse.

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girl: Daddie, what's at the end of a rainbow? Dad: No sweetie, a rainbow is acually just an illusion constructed by the refraction of light white as it passes through a water particle in the stratophere. Acting as a prisom the particle will seperate the different components of light, ordering them by the rank of the light energy and the intencity of it's frequency and wavelength.

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What did the child who tried to hang himself, but wasn't heavy enough to achieve breaking his neck do? Died slowly.

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The bird is not the word.... Its two

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i would like to know if the rumors about the moon being made out of chees is true because nobody told me it was CC

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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