Why did hitler need glasses? Because he could Nazi.

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An owl turns to the other owl. He has to, he can't move his eyes.

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why did the guy drop his umbrella........ because he was getting raped.

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Roses are Red, Violets are blue, Run Quick, Before I eat you and die of obesity due to high blood pressure and bad heart disease!!!

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I like my coffee like my women. Without a penis.

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Asians are a lot like spongebob They're terrible at driving and good at karate.

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A boat drowns in the middle of the water. Everyone dies except for an Asian guy. Why did he live? Because he could swim.

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what did helen keller name her dog? scruffy

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I've got a shotgun with two bullets. I've got two enemies. What do I do with the gun? Go bird hunting.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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69 HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH *goes crazy and shoots himself*

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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A man walked into a bar. It hurt.

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if two couples walk down the street, when do they die? when a pack of rabid dogs eats them.

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What did the orphan boy get for his birthday? The extermination of his race.

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What do you call a black person with a million dollars? A millionaire.

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Why do Teenagers, mostly girls between the ages of 12-17 love Justin Bieber? Answer: Because he promotes himself worldwide and makes sure that girls know who he is thus creating a fan base that will be large enough to promote his career, which ensures him a safe financial future.

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How do you kill half the population of Mexico? A preemptive nuclear strike.

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What did Batman say to Robin before the got into the Batmobile? - Come on Robin, get into the Batmobile.

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your mom is so stupid, she once wrote a math test and didn't do very well.

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Beauty is only skin deep Well of course it is, muscles, bones and tissues look disgusting.

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Don't you hate it when ads just [CONGRATULATIONS! YOU HAVE JUST WON A MILLION DOLLARS!* Please click this ad, so you can give us your full name, address, phone number, bank account number, pin number and mail your credit card to us, then you will receive your MILLION DOLLARS!* (you may or may not receive one million dollars) Thank you.] pop up anywhere these days?

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Your mother is so fat that I'm starting to worry about her health.

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knock knock who's there GET IN THE VAN!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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