Two unemployed Irishmen are out looking for work when they pass a lumberyard. There's a sign outside that said "Tree Fellers Wanted". Sean turns to Patrick and says " What a curious way to write that sign. Surely the term is lumberjack?" "Yes," says Patrick "but what with the current economic situation here in Ireland, I say we get in there, apply for the jobs and hope that our lack of experience is overlooked." "Okay." Says Sean. "And let's not mention the whole sign thing." "No."

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"Billy Mays here!" No he's not. He's dead.

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knock knock? whos there? eatmop. eatmopwho? HAHAHAH EAT MY POO

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how did the monkey fall out of the tree he was stupid how did the monkey get a black eye he was hit by a bus how did the monkey end up in the sewer he got hit by another bus

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anti jokes

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Knock, Knock. I have no door.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it felt like it!!!

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In Soviet Russia, Joke isn't funny!

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Q) why did jimmy kick the bucket. A) Because his dad is an alcoholic and Beats him to the point of near death, so He takes his anger out by kicking anatomit Objects such as a bucket.

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Why did the man burn all the children? He was a psychopath.

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why was the woman making a sandwich in the kitchen? because at the age of 3 she faced the hard reality of being nothing more in life then serving her husband to the day she die

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What do you call 10,000 black men with their heads sticking out of the ground? Afro-turf

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What happened when your mom closed the blinds? You.

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A man and a woman are alone, the man holds her down and says I'm going to rape you! The woman replies I'm not into that and leaves unharmed

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Why did the cop not arrest the driver? The Driver shot him 2 minutes earlier.

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Whats worse then this joke? Its punchline.

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what did the right wing jew say after he was arrested for murder? bt we went through the holocust

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sooo.how do you get a bonner when your in a room with lady gaga???? you tell lady gaga to turn around and you think of brittany spears bending over get it nahhh probably not

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Name two things that are stupid and can get stupider. You can't , there's only one a blonde

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What did the man do when he walked into the gym? Died of a brain aneurysm.

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Why did the homeless man get skin cancer Because he didn't have a home so the Suns rays had been directed towards him For 3 years and he was to poor to purchase Sun screen

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Your mama's so fat her patronus is a cake!

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*knock knock "there's a door bell"

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What do you call an anti joke with no punchline?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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