My wife crashed the car while listening to Adele last night. She ended up rolling in the jeep.

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Q:Why did the black man shoot the white man? A:The black man happened to be extremely good at paintball.

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Why was the little boy sad? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

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When I'm sad I cut myself... another slice of cheesecake.

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Why was the picture so dark? Because it was night time and there were no light fixtures located anywhere near where the photo was taken.

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What's better than getting to sleep in? Sex for the very first time.

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want to hear a joke? so a guy comes into a bar, wait no it was a horse so a guy comes into a horse,,,

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Why do policemen wear belts? To hold up their pants.

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What is worse than a Catholic priest being caught red handed raping 7 kids? 1. Thou shall not steal. 2. Thou shall be kindeth to thy neigbour... 3. Not attending to church is a sin... Moral: Catholic priests need to get their priorities straight... or gay, just not pedo!

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what do you call a little girl next to a mexican? a rape victim.

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Q: What is a duck's favorite thing to smoke? A: Quack

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Two goldfish are sat in a tank, one says to the other 'I forgot who you are' to which the other replies 'I forgot what you said'.

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A fish swims up stream for his natural spawning cycle. The fish was out of shape and died from heart failure.

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Why was the pencil case unzipped? Because it wasn't zipped up.

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#1 rule in arguments: if losing, start correcting their grammar

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Q: What did the prostitute say to the other prostitute? A: I have AIDS.

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Yo mama's so fat she couldn't ride on roller coasters with you in Disney world. Sometimes you wish you could share more fond memories with her.

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A boy asks his teacher to go to the bathroom, she says ok but only if he can sya the alphabet. He says ok, but for some reason skips the letter P. How come? -Because he has a sever learning disability and is having a hard time remebering all the letters of the alphabet

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What's worse than missing Taco Tuesday? Your whole family dying in a car crash.

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what's funnier than 3 dead babies in a trashcan pretty much anything thats not funny

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Why grannies do not buy a menstrual pads? Cause they will never have their period anymore.

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why was 6 afraid of 7? because 7 8 9

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what did the train say to the other train choo chooo

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How long did it take for Michael to screw in the lightbulb? 37 minutes. Michael has cerebral palsy.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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