Waiter, waiter! There's a fly in my soup! Apologies for the inconvenience sir, I shall bring you a new bowl as soon as possible.

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why was the snowman so happy? because a child placed pieces of coal in a "u" shape on it.

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What's the difference between a watermelon and a baby? One of them I can whack with a hammer, the other is a watermelon.

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Two muffins are in an oven. It was a really small batch.

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What's red and smells like blue paint? Red paint.

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Why are these jokes so funny? Because they're NOT!

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How did the priest die? Masterbation

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Roses are red Violets are blue Billy is dead and Atom bombs blow up chines $

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Q: What do you call a man with no arms and no legs being pulled behind a boat? A: Skip.

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why cant Joey jump for joy? beacause hes dead

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How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? It should only take one person to do this job regardless of hair color.

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What's green and has wheels? A snow flake. I lied about the wheels, and the color.

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Two guys walk into the woods an saw a naked lady.One guys ran away. When his friend met up with him he ask why did u run away. He siad "my mom said if i a naked lady that i would turn to stone and i felt myself getting hard."

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Q: What did Santa give the little boy for Christmas? A: Nothing, he's not real

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A young Asian boy got a B on his test. He went home an showed his parents even though he was nervous of their reaction. They told him that a B was a good grade and put it on the fridge. After that he began to gradually flunk each class one by one because of his parent's inability to push him to be better. He is now homeless and an alcoholic.

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What do you call a black guy in a prison? A warden. You racist.

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What do you call putting a vehicle on the side of the road? Parking.

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What's White and can't climb up a tree? A fridge.

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Why did Superman stop collecting stones? Did he ever? Moral: Yes but his kryptonite collection seemed to slow him down at times... until he stopped...

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Why did the Jewish boy grab his groin? Because he was just circumcised.

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What do you call a whore? Kelsey cook duh

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Why did the tomato blush? Because it began to ripen.

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Kesley Ioannou not shopping.

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guess what what? nothing.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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