Why was the woman's purse so heavy? Because it had a lot of stuff in it.

Get your coat, I've got a knife.

Women's rights...

Your mom is so fat because she ate her emotions when your dad walked out, not to mention her history of bulimia as a teenager.

If you're doing a maths test, what type of pickles are best when licking a baseball bat? Sasquatch

A Priest, a Rabbi, and a Methodist minister were playing golf. The Priest won by one stroke.

What is next?

Knock knock. Who's there? It's the police. Your father's been taken to county jail for his third DUI.

A red house is red. A blue house is blue. What color is the green house? Clear they are made of glass.

Q: why did the guys neck hurt after the car crash A: he had a sun burn

Q: What's the difference between a basket of tennis balls and a basket of dead baby heads? A: One is used for the sport of tennis the other is a basket of tennis balls!

Knock knock! Who's There? @HurricaneKris4 on Twitter Ok I'll follow you...

Q: What did one tube of glue say to the other tube of glue? A:Nothing. They're tubes of glue. Inanimate objects, such as a tube of glue, however adhesive the contents of said object is, are not capable of advanced speech, let alone basic communication.

Why did Sally drink water? Because she wanted to take pills and kill herself.

Why did the girl die? No one knows.

knock knock. Who's There? Cancer.

a man walked up to me and said someone is dying with long terminal cancer i said who? man replies your cat. i replied i don't have a cat. man says whoops wrong person

Why did the chicken cross the road? It had the utmost desire to.

An abortionist secretly fancies himself pro life, with reservations. Overwhelmed, and utterly fed up, with the burden of carrying on the family business, he aborts himself. Although he was only 46, his frail mother was nevertheless proud of his decision to succeed where she had failed 46 years ealier.

Why did Helen Keller cross the road? To end her misery.

Your mother is so fat that she has diabetes

What is wrong with this phrase? The next line is false. The first line is true. Answer: llamas

What do you call a bunch of Mexicans on fire? Jumping Beans.

Justin Beiber

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...