How do you kill 23 kids? You put 24 kids in an arena.

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How its supposed to go: Knock knock Who's there? I eat mop. I eat mopwho? How my friend Cassidy did it: Knock knock Who's there? I eat my poo! Oh wait I screwed up.

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Who am I? Your name is Harvey Jackson. Let's get you dressed so we can go downstairs for dinner. Nurse Holland will be helping you in a few moments.

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What's worse than 1,000 babies stapled to 1,000 trees? 1001 babies stapled to 1001 trees.

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Why do showers in Germany have 11 holes? Because a regular human on has 10 fingers.

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What do you call a black guy who flies an airplane? A pilot, you racist.

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A patient walks into a clinic and says, "Doctor, Doctor! I feel like a pair of curtains!" The doctor replies, "I have no interest in whether or not you feel like purchasing items to spruce up your home."

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What's better than winning a medal in the Special Olympics? Not being retarded.

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there are 2 sausages in a pan. one sausage says "wow it's hot in here" and the other sausage says "MY GOD A TALKING SAUSAGE!!!!"

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Why'd the chicken cross the road? It didn't. Chickens are raised on farms, which are away from society. They are taken care of in pens, and have no way of escaping. Therefore it couldn't have crossed any roads.

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what did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

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Two Jews walk into a bar, and they were both served properly

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roses are black violets are too im colorblind how about you

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im a ginger and i get beat up everyday

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Hey, are you 5? Ya I am 5 inches deep in your MOM!!

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Why did the woman leave the kitchen? Because she didn't want to be late for work.

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a black guy and a hispanic are in a car. Whos driveing? The bvlack guys mom, picking them up from a church class, and takeing them to volunteer a the local homeless shelter.

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Whats red and eats like dog? A fox.

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What do you call a guy who makes jokes about a girl being in the kitchen? Single.

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what's the difference between people and horses? people have two less legs.

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why didn't the printer work? it was in the toilet.

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What did nike say to addidas? Hi

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What's black and tasteless? either herpes or a redheads soul

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Q: What do you call a man with no arms and no legs being pulled behind a boat? A: Skip.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops