What's the difference between Mitt Romney and a cheese grader? How the hell should i know?

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like for a handjob.

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Knock Knock? Who's there? Dr. Fishbourne Dr. Fishbourne? Yea, I've come to inform you that your son has committed suicide due to lack of parental care and love.

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marshal sterio had sex

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there are 2 black guys and a spanish guy in a car. who is driving? a sober, US citizen over the age of 16

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if two couples walk down the street, when do they die? when a pack of rabid dogs eats them.

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Abe Lincholn had a son :) But he died |:

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How many cows does it take to swim on land? 4.2

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Whats worse than a mother of 3 children, jumping off a bridge, smashing into the metal roof of a large car and dieing on impact? A mother of 3 children jumping off a bridge, smashes into the metal roof of a large car, survives,, becomes paralyzed, and has to explain to her children, why she is in a wheel chair for the rest of her life.

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How do you make a tissue dance? You put a little boogie into in!

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What do you call 10 dead babies in a blender? A horrible, horrible child abuse incident.

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A guy comes to a doctor and says: - Doctor, lately I'm having this dream where I kill my father and rape my mother. What does it mean? - Nothing.

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A: Knock Knock! B: Come in!

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what did the train say to the other train choo chooo

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How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? 3

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A Higgs Boson walks into a church. The priest says “We don’t allow Higgs Bosons in here.” The Higgs Boson replied, “Well, without me, you can’t have mass.”

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The graduate with a Science degree asks, "Why does it work?" The graduate with an Engineering degree asks, "How does it work?" The graduate with an Accounting degree asks, "How much will it cost?" The graduate with a Liberal Arts degree asks, "Do you want fries with that?"

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wnba

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A child with cancer grows up.

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How many Jews does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One.

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A Priest, a Rabbi, and an Orca Whale walk into a local eatery to discuss what is on their mind. The Priest says he is proud that even though their community is comprised of people residing in many different religions, they still work together to strive for a better tomorrow. The Rabbi nods his head in agreement,he states that he is proud of all the hard working men in their community that are willing to make sacrifices for the needy. The Orca Whale also nods in agreement and pauses for a moment to think while he insight-fully gleams at his two other friends. The Mighty Orca Whale then contributes to the conversation by saying eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuurrrr!

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D is for diabetes, Cookie Monster, if you keep this up.

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What is the difference between my elbow and my penis? I Cant lick my elbow

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What is the difference between black people and HIV? They are of a specific ethnicity whom which share specific ideals and background; whilst the other is a virus contracted from sexual intercourse.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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