a man walked into a bar "ouch"

What happens when you lay a diamond in the water for two hours? It gets wet.

What does a human have in common with a tree?? You can cut a humans leg of and count the....oh wait

I used to walk in front of archers, but then I took an arrow to the knee.

- Ask me if I'm a firetruck. - Are you a firetruck? - No.

Why does a trash can smell bad? Because there's trash in it.

3 men walk into a bar. The fourth one ducks.

Knock knock! Who's there? This. This who? This joke.

What do you call an asian guy in a police uniform? A police officer.

What do you call: A black person, A white person, A mexican, A Jew, And an athiest? Whatever their names are!

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? I threw a refrigerator at it

Why did the chicken cross the road? He was suicidal.

Knock Knock, Who's there? The Police. *No Answer* The police then give the S.W.A.T the signal, bust down the door, and kill 15 high profile targets issued by Liberia. The man who did not answer the door was Carlos Pedrouez, a serial killer, meth addict who has been apart of the Arizona sex slave trade for over a decade. The world can now sleep softly. The door was also red.

Why didn't the blonde get into college? She was killed in a car accident.

What did Sarah Palin say to her daughter on Christmas? Merry Christmas

Whats worse than being arrested for a crime you didn't commit? Teenage pregnancy.

The duck says do you smell poop. Ya says the chicken, it wasn't me It was the turkey

What happened when the Asian girl got an 89 on her Test? Her parents kicked her out of their house.

Why did Sara fall off the swings? She had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Sara.

What do you call a bird on the beach? A seagull.

One time I went into a haunted house. It was just pretend ghosts but then I saw a real ghost there. It was scary.

Two black people fall off a cliff, who hits the ground first? Who Cares?

A man walks up to a dead baby. The baby is dead

Why did the small child fall down the stairs? Because he had lung cancer was in a wheel chair and I was incredibly tempted to push him down the stairs.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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