Can you see this brett? Connor

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How do you wake up your snoring friend? Cut his feet off.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Nothing...he found it.

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How do you confuse a black man? Paint him white.

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What did the kid use to smell his food His nose

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Why doesnt the ladder work? A ladder is an inaminent object therefore imcapable of having a job.

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What's the difference between a teacher and a train?!? The teacher is a highly-intelligent organism and the train is a large vehicle used in transporting goods over long distances on the ground.

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What is black and hangs from trees in my backyard? Not black berries because black berries come from a bush.

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If a blonde and a brunette fell off a building, who would hit the ground first? Answer: Newton's Law dictates that they would hit the ground at the same time.

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What is green and red all over? The Hulk's Penis in a blender

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gay rights

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Why cant Roger drive a tractor? Because Roger is a goldfish.

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Me: "Dad! Can you make me a sandwich?" Dad: "Poof! You are now a sandwich."

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milk,eggs,butter,deodorant,chocolate syrup,chile powder,dildo,bacon

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Nothing yet CC

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What call a black man flying a plane? A pilot you racist.

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Dear Board of education, so are we.

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if life gives you lemons...chuck them back and say i wanted muffins instead!!!!

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Why did the little boy throw his clock out of the window? After hours of searching for the snooze button to no avail, the little boy became so irritated at the incessant ringing of the alarm that he threw it out of his window in a fit of rage. The clock landed on an old woman who was walking twenty stories below. She was immediately killed on impact.

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Why did the koala fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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What is the difference between an Irishman and a plank of wood? Almost everything, including anatomy, chemical make up, mass etc

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Simple poke her face.

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A man walks into a bar. Now I have to kill you, because that's top secret information.

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How did bob Marley quit doing Drugs?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops