in 2001 a man was working happily in his office cubicle and got an email from his boss saying that he had great news for him. filled with excitment he knew he was getting A big promotion and could finally afford that new toy his kid has always wanted. Feeling great the man walks up to the office window to enjoy the view he notices a very large commercial airliner flying straight towards his office.

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Why did the woman have sex with the man? Because she is over 18, which is above all of the legal consent ages in the United States.

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2 women were sitting quietly

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Knock knock Who's there? Prost Prost who Prostitute

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It died.

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Knock Knock Hows there Theres no time for this you have AIDS

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How do you save someones life? Do not kill them.

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whats faster than the speed of light? a jew with a coupon

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead

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Why did the little boy throw his clock out of the window? After hours of searching for the snooze button to no avail, the little boy became so irritated at the incessant ringing of the alarm that he threw it out of his window in a fit of rage. The clock landed on an old woman who was walking twenty stories below. She was immediately killed on impact.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is blind and death, making her oblivious of her surroundings and would be a danger to fellow commuters. -mac

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What happens when you throw a green rock into the Red Sea? It gets wet.

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How did the man with no arm and no legs get to the store? Well he certainly didn't walk.

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women

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Why was the little boy sad? Because he had a fox stapled to his face.

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did u hear about evan porter going out with his computer of course not because u haven't read this joke yet

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What do you call cheese that isn't your's? Someone else's cheese.

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How do you know if a Frenchman has been in your house? You could ask a neighbor, or check to see if anything has been missing, or set up a camera. There are actually many ways.

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what do you call an indian dating service? you dont call it anything there all arranged marriages.

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What do you get when you cross a zombie with a beer? Nothing because zombies are just another subject dealing with the occult.

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Hey, you want to hear an anti-joke? yeah, sure. .....well, too bad!

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What's worse than being held hostage? Waking up and finding dick your mouth

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Why was the man crying He wasnt his allergies were acting up.

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knock knock whose there? it's me, Connie oh hi Connie, wont you come in? oh i was just wandering if i could borrow your scotch tape ofcourse! one moment please. no problem. say, hows phil been? oh he's great, he just got a new job! here's your scotch tape! thank you so much! ....................... what a perfect scene. It is very unfortunate, though, for as Connie walked away from the family whom she borrowed the tape from, a car came by and with a single strike, killed her. this proves that nothing is perfect.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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