A man walks into a bar and says "ouch." It was an Iron bar.

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A guy is walking on the beach one day when he stubs his toe on something shiny. Digging in the sand he finds an old, tarnished lamp. He takes it home and liberally applies polish, then puts it on his mantlepiece, it completes the look he was going for in his room and he feels like all his wishes have come true. His wife dies in a car accident later that day.

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whats sad about three black men driving off a cliff in a cadillac? a cadillac seats five.

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What did the pet lion say to its owner? Nothing. The lion then proceeded to hunt down its owner, pin him down and rip out his insides. Besides, the likelyhood of owning a lion as a pet is very slim, and even if one did, this act would be highly illegal in most parts of the world.

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Roses are red Violets are red I murdered the gardener

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Yeah? You like that? Its like art for some.

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If it looks like chicken and tastes like chicken but Chuck Norris says it's beef, politely correct him. He is actually a very sensible fellow and will probably thank you for doing so.

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There's some good news and some bad news. The bad news is there isn't any good news.

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What does a farmer say when he can't find his tractor? - Where's my tractor?

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How do you drown a blond? Hold her head under water until she finally stops thrashing around.

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Where's my shotgun

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if a cat is mean and a dogs a bitch then what do u call your wife? A MEAN ASS BITCH

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Why did the woman walk into the men's clothing store? She's a lesbian. Why did the man walk into the womens clothing store? He had to buy his mom a birthday present.

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A rabbi and a jew walk into a bar and had lot's of crazy anal sex ... then asked god for forgiveness. the end

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Hi my name is Jim

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GEORGE LOPEZ SUCKS

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I ate your horse.

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i eat poop

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A: Knock! Knock! B: Who's there? A: Kitchen B: Kitchen who? A: GET THERE!

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Want to hear the best joke ever? Want to hear it again?

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Why did the chicken cross the road To get to your house Knock knock: whos there? The chicken duh

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What do you call Chuck Norris when there is a bullet inside of him? Dead.

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Why did the girl run across the street? Because she was being chased by a man with a knife

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Why do Christians believe in God? Because he is real.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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