What did the man say when he was having sex with his wife? Nothing. It turns out it wasn't his wife, he was cheating on her with his mistress, the woman he was having sex with now, thus destroying their marriage.

Whats the worse than dieing of cancer, dieing alone and having AIDS

man 1 walks by man 2 man 1 says hey buddy whats up man 2 responds do i know you man 1 says no but i saw you seeing a movie on friday man 2 says oh cool but wasn't that movie great man 1 responds ya and man 1 and man 2 become best friends plus man 1 only liked man 2 because he was rich!!!

What do you do when the dishwasher is broken? Fix it, call a repair man, call the landlord, do the dishes by hand or don't do them at all... your options are endless.

how many moms can you fit in a bathtub? as many as you want

man: so where did you two meet? man tied to flower: in the produce section.

Justin Beiber and a speaker = no hearing within a 25 mile area

how do you know your at a gay picnic. the hotdogs smell like shit.

Your mum so fat, she died of a heart attack

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it felt like it!!!

why was the woman making a sandwich in the kitchen? because at the age of 3 she faced the hard reality of being nothing more in life then serving her husband to the day she die

Why did the blonde put lysol in the soup? to kill her husband

Man who wrote "The Hokey Pokey" died. Hard part was getting him into the coffin. They put his left leg in and then the trouble started..

What do you call a person on a swing? F u c k N i g g e r s

You are reading this.Ya you the fat one

A cow walks into an Asian bar and asks for a beer. The bartender asks it for I.D. It says "it doesn't matter. I came by horse."

Why was the tomato blushing? It saw the salad dressing.

What did the Shark say when he had no lunch? We have a FISHue!

Why was 6 scared of 7? Because 7 raped and murdered 8.

A ninja walks into a bar the bartender asks "what would you like?" The ninja says "i'll have two green eyes" the bartender says "we dont have green eyes this is america" so the ninja is so mad that he goes home and brutally beats his wife with a spatula.

What did the monkey say to the garbage collector? Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAAA

Q: Why did Sally fall off the swing? A: She had no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

Q: How do you fit 100 mexicans in a van? A: Its theoretically impossible.

One man says to another "Hey you have banana in your ears." The other man replies "I can't hear you, I have bananas in my ears."

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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