Why does a trash can smell bad? Because there's trash in it.

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Whats yellow and cant swim? A bulldozer.

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Why didn't the blonde get into college? She was killed in a car accident.

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A Jew picked up a penny. He thought his beard matched the guy on the coin.

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I still remember the last words my grandpa said to me before he kicked the bucket. He said, "Hey. how far do you think I can kick this bucket."

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Roses are red, violets are red, daffodils are yellow, and pansies are pink.

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What did the cow say to the other cow? Moo.

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The duck says do you smell poop. Ya says the chicken, it wasn't me It was the turkey

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Twisty Snake bite: Doctors office. Patient: Err Doc, a snake bit me in the err, private area... Doctor: I must suck out the poison immediately! Patient: What? Man! Are you sick? How do I even know if the snake was poisonous? Besides they only do that crap in bad jokes! Doctor: Yeah but this is an anti joke so drop em! Later at home: Wife: So did the Doctor help you dear? Patient: Worst doctor ever, he really sucked!

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Knock Knock Come in, the door's open.

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One time I went into a haunted house. It was just pretend ghosts but then I saw a real ghost there. It was scary.

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HAHA SO ONE TIME... The man could not finish his story because he gets shot, and is mourned for years. His daughter was watching it all. She then jumped. And fell. And broke her knee. And then died. yeah

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What do you say if you see your TV floating in the middle of the night? I'm not sure, but I would probably have nightmares for a couple weeks.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? -Hey! Where's my tractor?

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How do you torture Helen Keller? Give her a cheese-grater and tell her it's a book.

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What is Helen Keller's dogs name? She had fish.

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1, 2, buckle my shoe. 3, 4, shut the door. 5, 6, I'm gonna to cut you in your sleep.

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Where do black people get there hair cut? At a hairdresser.

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Your mother

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knock knock. Who's there? John. John who? John Wayne Gacy.

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? The wind. The wind who? ...

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Why do Jews circumcise their children.......because they like everything 10% off

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Do you want to hear a joke? To bad! :)

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Why are we on a roof? Becuse some idiot gave us all roofies.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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