what is white and black and red all over? a half eaten penguin

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Why do I know Vin Diesel is gay? Because I sucked his dick

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What is worse than a baby nailed to a tree? The holocaust. What is worse than 20 babies nailed to a tree? A baby nailed to 20 trees.

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? "Poker Face"

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How much wood could a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood? 17

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How do you spell Mississippi with out an i? You can't because removing an i from the word Mississippi would cause it to be spelled incorrectly.

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If you are a girl reading this! why did you stop making some food?

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What did the Dog say to the Cat? Nothing, Cats and Dogs are of different species and can therefore not understand one another.

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Penis

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96

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What's the difference between a catholic priest and acne? Acne waits until the boys hit puberty before coming on their face.

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How many Republicans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? I would think one would be sufficient, though political affiliation shouldn't have anything to do with the situation. Unless the lightbulb was residing in a specified meeting place for members of the Republican party. Also, if the building was a more public institution for gatherings, which could imply larger ceilings, then two might be needed, just for safety precautions.

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What's the difference between your dog and your mother? Your dog doesn't think you're a disgrace to the family

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A man, trying to be polite, asks his irritating coworker, "Did you get a haircut?" His coworker responds, "No, I got them all cut!" The man groans and shakes his head.

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A catholic priest held a puppet show at a kindergarten. The children were a very polite audience and the event was considered a great success.

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What do you call a guy being followed by about 30 others with high powered rifles? A military general serving for his country.

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Society.

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That didn't hurt.

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What did the girl say to the boy? I don't know it was a private conversation

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Hey, Texas! Knock knock Texas: Who's there? Ebola

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How many Jews does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One.

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How do you make someone feel stupid? You throw a smart person at them

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Why is Bruce Wayne named Batman and Tim Drake named Robin? They wanted to hunt bats and robins whenever someone does something bad.

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Do you know what would happen if you were to like this Anti-Joke? ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... I would get another like.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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