How did the chicken cross the road? By foot.

roses are red violets are blue i took your cup to the bathroom ...thats not really apple juice:)

Why do they censor everything on here? Because **** **** ******* *** ***** *****.

whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Nothing finding a worm in an apple is disgusting because worms are disgusting creature that shouldn't live in an apple

George Bush.

How many light bulbs does it take to screw in a dyslexic child.? DAMN

A young Asian boy got a B on his test. He went home an showed his parents even though he was nervous of their reaction. They told him that a B was a good grade and put it on the fridge. After that he began to gradually flunk each class one by one because of his parent's inability to push him to be better. He is now homeless and an alcoholic.

What's better than winning a Gold Medal in the Special Olympics? Not being handicapped in the first place.

(Knock Knock) Who's there? You were late paying your mortgage and now your house is being repossessed by the bank.

7

How do you make a tissue dance? You put a little boogie into in!

Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get surgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

What did Batman say to Robin before the got into the Batmobile? - Come on Robin, get into the Batmobile.

Abe Lincholn had a son :) But he died |:

Rather rich and healthy, then poor and sick.

What did Justin Bieber say when he felt funny? Wheres my tampon

The graduate with a Science degree asks, "Why does it work?" The graduate with an Engineering degree asks, "How does it work?" The graduate with an Accounting degree asks, "How much will it cost?" The graduate with a Liberal Arts degree asks, "Do you want fries with that?"

A Higgs Boson walks into a church. The priest says “We don’t allow Higgs Bosons in here.” The Higgs Boson replied, “Well, without me, you can’t have mass.”

Why does Lady GaGa have no hair down there? It's physically impossible to grow hair on your toenails.

Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? Because she was both deaf and blind and both senses are essential to a driver

You are driving a bus. At the first stop, 12 people get on and 7 get off At the second stop, 13 people get on and 11 get off At the third stop, 7 people get off the bus. You turn the bus off get out and go home.

What did george washington say before he and his troops crossed the delaware river? We are going to cross the delaware river. R...

why does'nt mexico have an olympic team? because they have a poor economy and have other things to worry about.

A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says, "Hey pal, why the long face?" The horse neighed.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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