Roses are red, Violets are blue, Holy ****, I'm in heaven.

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What is big, red, and beats rocks? A big, red, rock beater.

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"Why is Barney green and purple?" "Because the producers of the show decided to make him that way."

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what does trondifly mean? trondify is not a real word.

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A student goes up to the teacher because he has to go to the washroom. The teacher tells him that he has to sing the ABC's before he can go. So the boy sings, "ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ." The teacher said he did a perfect job and could go to the washroom. The boy went on to become a billionaire. Congrats!

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what is the difference between a Jew and a pizza? -one is the chosen people of Isreal and one is a food that was founded in Italy

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Where did Sheyanne go during the bombing...... Everywhere

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Yo momma so ugly that she had self esteem issues and committed suicide, making her husband extremely depressed.

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Why do witches ride on brooms? Because they have magical powers!

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A man walked into a bar. Ouch.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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You just won the game...

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why is the name Brian so funny BECAUSE IT IS!

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Knock knock SCREW YOU I BUSY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Why was he arrested? He broke the law.

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How do you make Al Gore cry? Kill his daughter.

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What did Uncle Timmy give to Little John for his birthday? Sodomy.

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A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

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a seal walks into a bar. replace "bar" with "club". and replace "walks into" with "gets bludgeon by."

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Obama is a black man living in a white house. TEEHEE

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Knock Knock Who's there? The mailman The mailman who? How dumb are you?

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What do you do when jews take over your country? Invade Poland.

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What did the sea say to the sand? Nothing, he just waved.

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Two muffins are in an oven. The first muffin says, "Boy it's hot in here." The second says, "It sure is." Both muffins then faint from heat exhaustion and are eaten to death when taken out of the oven And thus tragically, the world would never know of the spectacular talking muffins.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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