man: honey im home woman: john im pregnant man: but i have a low sperm count! this is a miracle! woman: its not your baby its steves from the store man:but he's mexican! woman: i know.....i need an abortion. {lol racism}

Have you ever tried ethiopian food? No. Neither have they

What did the wise old widow across the street get for Hanukkah? Cardiac Arrest.

What is white, long, and thin? A tablecloth

Why did the boy miss the school bus? He died in his sleep

What do you call 10,000 lawers jumping out of a plane? A good start.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He was suicidal.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? I threw a refrigerator at it

A student goes up to the teacher because he has to go to the washroom. The teacher tells him that he has to sing the ABC's before he can go. So the boy sings, "ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ." The teacher said he did a perfect job and could go to the washroom. The boy went on to become a billionaire. Congrats!

Black Veil Brides.

There is this dylectic who can't spell.

Knock Knock Come in, the door's open.

A squirrel walks up to a tree and says, " I forgot to store nuts for winter and now I am dead." Its funny because the squirrel gets dead.

John:Why couldn't the T-Rex clay his hands? Billy:Because his arms are too small! John:no he's extinct dumbass

roses is red violet is blue i will smack you

A plane crashes on the border of the United States and Canada. Where do they bury the survivors? Why would they bury the survivors? THEY'RE ALIVE

Whats worse than being arrested for a crime you didn't commit? Teenage pregnancy.

How do you find the population of Mexico? You take a census count by mail and/or a door to door questionnaire.

What did the girl say to the boy? I don't know it was a private conversation

What did the tourist in Africa get? A souvenior.

Roses are red Violtes are Blue Sugar is Sweet and salt is salty

if a kayak was stuck in a tree with its headlights on, how many pancakes stacked will it take to get to the moon? none because snakes dont have armpits

George Bush.

why did the mans hair start to get shorter the barber was shaving it!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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