if one legs christmas and the other is new years then you have a rare desease call holidaylegtosisisisisis

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Q: What has 1 eye and half of a pig's snout? A: A pig peeking around a corner.

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What do you call someone who takes a toaster into their bath? Adele's number one fan.

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A Man walks in to a bar and orders a pint of lager, he notices something floating on the top of his drink so he calls over the bartender. "Excuse me, I think there's something in my dr-" The man's sentence was cut short as a man with a gun had just walked into the bar. He killed everyone, there were no survivors.

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what is pink stinky? your butthole lol

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What's worse than dropping your ice cream? Being Killed

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Knock knock. Who's there? Black guy. Due to your skin tone I feel you may cause potential danger to me and my family, so for that reason I will not allow you to enter my home.

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What did Squidqard say to Spongebob? Shut up.

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A woman walks out of the kitchen.

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whats funny ? not you i am telling the joke around here

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why is the asian still in the driveway? her car broke down

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What did the girl with no arms get for Christmas? Mittens

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Its april fools day and a women is in labour and has to rush to the hospital. Her husband couldn't make it so it is just the doctor and her in the delivery room. 4 hours of labour go by and complications arise. 12 hours later she gives birth toa beautiful baby boy. The doctor wipes the baby off and goes to hand it to her but then suddenly pulls it back and kicks it a cross the room. The mother screamed "my baby boy!" and the doctor smiles and says "April fools! It was already dead!"

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Where does lady gags buy her bran flakes ? Sainsburys

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What did my mom get for christmas? My dad, Dick in a box. My dad's name is Richard.

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http://Youtube.com/User/PeGamer22

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Knock Knock. Come in.

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A black man walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Hey Nick!" Because he knows him and is not racist.

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"Billy Mays here!" No he's not. He's dead.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead

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Customer: Can I have a tin of red paint, please? Shop owner: I'm sorry sir, we only have yellow paint left. Customer: That's ok, I have my bike with me.

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Why does it take more than one squirrel to change a lightbulb? Because they're so darn stupid!

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A white man and a black man were walking down the street. The black borrowed the white man's phone to make a quick call when an incoming call came in. The black man, while trying to hand the phone back, says, "Here, it's your Dad." The white man replies, "No, that's my phone." Amazed at how uneducated the black man was.

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Why was the tomato blushing? It saw the salad dressing.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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