A man goes to lie down on a couch. His wife walks by and sees him, and asks, "what are you doing?" to which he replies, "lying down"

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why did the chicken cross the road?? to go shopping for some aspirin because one of his children recently developed a raging headache and it was only logical for him to go to the pharmacy that was conveniantly placed across the road.

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- Ask me if I'm a firetruck. - Are you a firetruck? - No.

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Why do Teenagers, mostly girls between the ages of 12-17 love Justin Bieber? Answer: Because he promotes himself worldwide and makes sure that girls know who he is thus creating a fan base that will be large enough to promote his career, which ensures him a safe financial future.

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knock knock go away ok

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Wha'ts Slippery when wet? A Wet Slipper.

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''Levi Johnston is running for mayor of Wasilla, Alaska. Ironically, many of the babies he'll kiss on the campaign trail will be his own.''

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Q: what's red and goes up and down? A: a tomato in an elevator

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Roses are red Violets are blue who are you kidding, violets are violet

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A Blonde walks into a bar. She is an abusive relationship and is drinking her pain away.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She has no arms.

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What did the police say to the black man who just shot his wife? You are under arrest

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Why did the mushroom go to the party? Because he was a fungi.

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A:Your so fat that you take up the hole room B:If i am fat,Then i can crush you down thin head!

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cms.......?????

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Why was Superman white? Because Jerry Siegel is a racist.

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there are 2 black guys and a spanish guy in a car. who is driving? a sober, US citizen over the age of 16

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How do you fit 100 babies into a bucket? With a blender. How do you get them out again? With Doritos.

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What is Bigfoots favorite food? Biscuits and Gravy.

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a korean guy robs a black guys convenient store!

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Two muffins are in an oven. How does that even work? Muffin pans come with either 6 or 12 muffin holders.

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what kind of person screaws in a light blub........ a electrician

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AHAHAHAHAHA XD I cant for the life of me imagine Donald Duck accusing anyone of being a seducer XD, my eyes are tearing up XD If I do not type anything more, its because I died of laughter and joy XD But those "cartoons" where made for adults, ever seen steamboat Willie? That is one of my favorites, I always liked Mickey Mouse a bit better, Donald kinda changed a lot.

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Why was the black man pulled over? He was going 10 miles over the speed limit.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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