nine...eleven

This night was a stormy one, alot was destroyed, but the spirit of Little Jonny Harrison lived on with a shining light so strong it could blind some. Jonny lived in a village atop a hill. Citizens were frightened for their lives, all but Jonny. He was bullied from the age of 3 months, by his Uncle Clive, who was a Catholic Priest. Fear in the eyes of the normal residents, whilst, in Jonny's heart, there glowed a glow of pure hope and confidence, Jonny Harrison, was going into the storm. Jonny knew he could amount to something, if he really really tried. He has 6 years behind him, and a long life ahead, and he figured, what's the worst that could happen? He said to himself, there will be nothing worse out there than Uncle Clive's Magical Basement. Jonny sat his mother down, looked her in the eye and whispered farewell. He wished his father the best wishes possible. Finally, Rosie, Jonny's sweet old Grandmother, who had been addicted to Meth for about 25 years now and been through 13 interventions and countless suicide attempts, opened her ears to young Jonny's speech, he said softly in her ear, the words, "Hang in there, Gran. I know you can pull through, I may be only six but I sure as heck know how much i care for you.". The words of love echoed in her ears as Jonny walked away. He took with him a carton of Ribena and his lucky medal and took his first step outside. He took the carton of Ribena, crumpled it up, spraying fruit juice on his dungarees, and threw it to the wet grass. He faced the towering lightning cloud and shouted, "Nothing will stop me!". Jonny died shortly after of AIDS. His Uncle Clive was sentence to 5 years in prison for child molestation and consistant child abuse. Rosie Harrison died later that day.

a man walks into a bar it hurt

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead.

Whats green all over and travels at 100mph A christmas tree in a gokart

why was the snowman so happy? because a child placed pieces of coal in a "u" shape on it.

what did the crippled boy get for christmas? cancer.

You just won the game...

Why can't Billy ride the bicycle? Billy's a fish.

Make an effort in life whenever you want. Fight trough life when you got no other choice.

What's easier to get than a broke hooker on the side of the street? Osama Bin Laden.

What did the Farmer say to his tractor? Most likely his life story, Farmers arn't always the most popular.

A red house is red. A blue house is blue. What color is the green house? Clear they are made of glass.

A guy is walking on the beach one day when he stubs his toe on something shiny. Digging in the sand he finds an old, tarnished lamp. He takes it home and liberally applies polish, then puts it on his mantlepiece, it completes the look he was going for in his room and he feels like all his wishes have come true. His wife dies in a car accident later that day.

What is worse than hell?

What did the man say when he saw a truck in his yard? There's a truck in my yard.

What's White and can't climb up a tree? A fridge.

What did Helen Keller name her dog? Well i would imagine one of various names for a domesticated animal and she would choose the name based on her likes towards nature or an element of nature, being the educated individual she i would think she may name it base on a person of importance, such as an author or maybe a writer that inspires her.

69, hahaha

Why did everyone call the one-legged man Matt? Because that was his name.

Why do Christians believe in God? Because he is real.

What happened to the newlywed couple who couldn't tell the difference between KY jelly and window putty? All their windows fell out.

Rock mattress.

How much wood could a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood?.....Why the **** do you care?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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