i eat poop

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kiss me?

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A man walks into a bar and says "ouch." It was an Iron bar.

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How do you piss off a female archeologist? Kill her dog.

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Jesus was nailed to the cross by Roman guards... His disciples were kept behind a line of guards and they could not hear Jesus speak. They can see he was saying something, so they had to get closer to hear what he was saying. John dodged a guard and ran towards Jesus, but a guard cut his leg off with a sword... Peter ran for it and got past John but another guard cut off one of his legs... Matthew saw this opportunity to dodge both guards and jets past both John and Peter and gets to the foot of the cross... Jesus looks down at Matthew and says, "Matthew.... I can see your house from here!"

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what do you call a shoe with legs? roadrunners.

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How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? As much as he wants to.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was making a suicide attempt.

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What do you call a prison inmate with no arms or legs? John. That's his name.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Hitler. Good.

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What's the difference between a black man and a bunk bed? A bunk bed is stable and can support two children.

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Why are these jokes so funny? Because they're NOT!

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Q. What do you call a black pilot A. A pilot

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Why is it called a tea kettle Because it is a kettle and you make tea in it

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How do you stop your baby from crawling into your room? Shove a spear through its head.

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why did the parakeet eat the cracker? because it wanted to.

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dad; were is ur head son; its on my neck duh

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What do you call a bear eating another bear? A cannibal.

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Poop

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A man was drinking vodka at his friends party. He got a headache. He told his friend, and his friend said that there was asprin in the cabinet. The man ate some. He died. He was stabbed from behind, and the blade pierced his lungs.

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Why didn't the girl put on her mascara? Because she was too poor to buy any.

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Whats worse than receiving a dollar? Receiving a penny.

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you

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What do you call an Arab man flying a plane? A pilot.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops