Why was the little boy sad? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

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How did Helen Keller meet her husband? On a blind date.

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A guy walks into a restaurant and sits down only to realize he is not wearing any pants. Immediately the police are called and arrest the man for indecent exposure. Given there were children in the restaurant at the time, the man is also charged as level 3 sex offender and is held on $100,000 bail. His wife commits suicide from embarrassment, leaving her 10 year old son up for adoption who later gets involved with drugs due to his rough childhood.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she was born with the disorders of being blind and deaf. For any human, having blindness and deafness makes driving a near impossible task.

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My butt!!!!

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Why can't Stevie Wonder drive? There is no steering wheel at the back of the bus.

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Why cant Hellen Keller Drive? Because shes a women.

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Do you know the Muffin Man? Of course you don't, faggot.

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What's big and purple? Something that's big and purple

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Why are elephants big, grey, and wrinkled? Because if they were small, white, and round they'd be called aspirin.

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Why didn't the black man drink out of the white water fountain? Because he wasn't thirsty.

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Why was Timmy dirty? Because he was buried

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Knock knock Who's there? An elf. An elf who? An elf who wants to be a dentist.

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What do airplanes and grapes have in common? They both have wings, except a grape doesn't.

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According to astronomy, when you wish upon a star, you're actually a few million years late. That star is dead. Just like your dreams.

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Why was the guy on top of the van It was his funeral

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Whats red and smells like blue paint? Red paint.

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Whats small, rough, and painful to put in your ass? Sandpaper

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The Treatment of Steve Bartman

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What did Steven Hawking say to God after he died? Nothing. He can't talk.

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Black Veil Brides.

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Why are "Polish" and "polish" spelled the same? The word is a homophone.

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What happened when the Asian girl got an 89 on her Test? Her parents kicked her out of their house.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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